Saturn: [coldly] Thank you, Lady Moon.
Moon: I'm sorry you're upset. [smile] I hope Sol can help you understand. It's been a weird few months since you've been gone.
Saturn: I think that's a safe assumption, Lady Moon. Your dedication to duty is admirable.
Moon: If I didn't know you better, Saturn, I'd almost take that as a compliment. Please go inside.
[Saturn knocks on the Sun's office door]
Sun: [from behind door] Come on in, Saturn. [Saturn opens door] Make yourself at home...I've put out the chair you like.
Saturn: Thank you, sir.
Sun: It's hard as a rock but you do enjoy it.
Saturn: I got your note, sir. Thanks for taking the time to see me.
Sun: I should know better than to try pleasantries with you, Saturn. They're more for my benefit than yours.
Saturn: Well, since you know me so well, sir, you should have understood how I was going to perceive a handwritten note telling me to come see you at the earliest possible opportunity.
Sun: That's a fair point, Saturn. I wanted the opportunity to explain to you what happened during your absence and to extend my apologies to you.
Saturn: With all due respect, sir, I'd like to start with how someone was allowed access to my office.
Sun: Yes, I suppose you would. Your boundaries have been violated, and for that you have my sincere apologies. [Pause] We had a little bit of a strange situation here around the 4th of July involving explosives.
Saturn: [straightens in his chair] I see. Go on, please.
Sun: As does sometimes occur, each planet in his or her own way does sort of get...out of bounds from time to time. And in this case I'm talking in the "carried away" sense, and not in the sense of declination, if you take my meaning.
Saturn: [slowly nods]
Sun: In this particular case, one of your colleagues decided that at this...ummm, festive, time of year, it would be funny to play pranks on other members of the team.
Saturn: Using explosives.
Sun: Yes. Typically in the other incidents bang caps were used. In your case, the incendiary devices were more powerful.
Saturn: You are aware, sir, that under section 75 of the Astrological...
Sun: [holds up his hand] Old Man, it's been a rough summer. I appreciate your dedication to protocol, but please do NOT quote the rule book for me. Believe me, I've read it enough times in the past 12 weeks to realize that to many people, rules, no matter what form they take--guidelines, laws, or social cues--are to be ignored. So to summarize, I'm aware of the statute.
Saturn: So...someone blew my office door...up? Off? I'm not sure which was is totally correct, but that doesn't take away the hurtfulness of the act.
Sun: I understand and appreciate how you must feel about this. Jupiter placed your order in your office only because the door was already compromised. The point I want to make clear to you is that there was no deliberate attempt made by anyone to access your space.
Saturn: I'm not even sure what that really means. Did anyone else have their boundaries violated?
Sun: Not to the extent that yours were. But most everyone was affected in a similar, albeit less destructive, fashion.
Saturn: And has the perpetrator of this heinous act been caught?
Sun: Will it make you feel better if I say yes?
Saturn: Feeling "better" for me is irrelevant, but I might be slightly mollified if justice has been served.
Sun: Then yes.
Saturn: You understand that I hold you personally responsible for allowing this conduct to occur, sir.
Sun: Of course I do, Saturn. I knew you would from the moment the incident occurred. At that time, using the authority vested in me, I performed a complete investigation and meted out punishment to the guilty party.
Saturn: Excuse me if I'm not impressed by your "authority", since it does not appear to have prevented the damage to my property in the first place!
Sun: [SIGH] This is getting tedious. You're getting an explanation and more detail than you should only out of respect for your many years of dedicated service. But if you think I'll allow you to disparage me or my title, you are mistaken. And I think you owe me an apology for that last remark, as unprofessional as it was.
Saturn: It's my sad duty to inform you that unfortunately, sir, you won't be getting one. What I want is for my door to be repaired and to return to work. That's it.
Sun: [hands Saturn a small brown envelope] Here are the keys to your new office door, Saturn. Just before you questioned my ability to lead earlier, I was going to tell you that as part of the penalty the perpetrator paid for a even sturdier door to ensure that this particular incident does not recur.
Saturn: You have my gratitude, sir.
Sun: Our appointment is over, Saturn. I'll see you at our next meeting.
Saturn: Yes, sir. [gets up and leaves]
[Moon enters and closes the Sun's office door]
Moon: Sol...
Sun: Luna, I'm so angry I can't even speak.
Moon: Teachable moment time, then. What are we supposed to do with feedback?
Sun: Luna, this is hardly the time...
Moon: Bullshit. You need to hear this message, Sol. As a servant leader, what are YOU supposed to do with feedback?
Sun: [SIGH] Consider it, even if the source is toxic.
Moon: Correct. And then?
Sun: Decide whether or not it has any merit.
Moon: And in this case...does it have merit?
Sun: [shouting] FROM THAT MOTHER FUCKING PROTOCOL-FOLLOWING JUDGEMENTAL SONOFABITCH? He has NO IDEA what it's like to try to lead these planets!
Moon: That's your ego talking. He's the eptiome of toxic, Sol. Answer the question, please.
Sun: [PAUSE] Honestly, I'm not sure that there's anything I could have done to prevent this.
Moon: For what it's worth, I tend to agree. So I think we'd both agree that his feedback does not have merit. Then what do we do?
Sun: Let it go.
Moon: Correct. [Looks down at her Erin Condren planner] You've got about an hour before your next meeting. We're going to consider that time as "personal reflection" for your leadership tracker. [gets up] I'll need the agenda for next week's meeting soon. [walks toward door]
Sun: Luna...you'd be better at this job than I am. You prove it all the time.
Moon: [smiles] That's your bruised ego talking now. Someone tried to knock you off your horse today, Sol. He didn't. A win is a win.
[The Moon opens the door, exits, and gently closes it behind her]
Saturn: So...someone blew my office door...up? Off? I'm not sure which was is totally correct, but that doesn't take away the hurtfulness of the act.
Sun: I understand and appreciate how you must feel about this. Jupiter placed your order in your office only because the door was already compromised. The point I want to make clear to you is that there was no deliberate attempt made by anyone to access your space.
Saturn: I'm not even sure what that really means. Did anyone else have their boundaries violated?
Sun: Not to the extent that yours were. But most everyone was affected in a similar, albeit less destructive, fashion.
Saturn: And has the perpetrator of this heinous act been caught?
Sun: Will it make you feel better if I say yes?
Saturn: Feeling "better" for me is irrelevant, but I might be slightly mollified if justice has been served.
Sun: Then yes.
Saturn: You understand that I hold you personally responsible for allowing this conduct to occur, sir.
Sun: Of course I do, Saturn. I knew you would from the moment the incident occurred. At that time, using the authority vested in me, I performed a complete investigation and meted out punishment to the guilty party.
Saturn: Excuse me if I'm not impressed by your "authority", since it does not appear to have prevented the damage to my property in the first place!
Sun: [SIGH] This is getting tedious. You're getting an explanation and more detail than you should only out of respect for your many years of dedicated service. But if you think I'll allow you to disparage me or my title, you are mistaken. And I think you owe me an apology for that last remark, as unprofessional as it was.
Saturn: It's my sad duty to inform you that unfortunately, sir, you won't be getting one. What I want is for my door to be repaired and to return to work. That's it.
Sun: [hands Saturn a small brown envelope] Here are the keys to your new office door, Saturn. Just before you questioned my ability to lead earlier, I was going to tell you that as part of the penalty the perpetrator paid for a even sturdier door to ensure that this particular incident does not recur.
Saturn: You have my gratitude, sir.
Sun: Our appointment is over, Saturn. I'll see you at our next meeting.
Saturn: Yes, sir. [gets up and leaves]
[Moon enters and closes the Sun's office door]
Moon: Sol...
Sun: Luna, I'm so angry I can't even speak.
Moon: Teachable moment time, then. What are we supposed to do with feedback?
Sun: Luna, this is hardly the time...
Moon: Bullshit. You need to hear this message, Sol. As a servant leader, what are YOU supposed to do with feedback?
Sun: [SIGH] Consider it, even if the source is toxic.
Moon: Correct. And then?
Sun: Decide whether or not it has any merit.
Moon: And in this case...does it have merit?
Sun: [shouting] FROM THAT MOTHER FUCKING PROTOCOL-FOLLOWING JUDGEMENTAL SONOFABITCH? He has NO IDEA what it's like to try to lead these planets!
Moon: That's your ego talking. He's the eptiome of toxic, Sol. Answer the question, please.
Sun: [PAUSE] Honestly, I'm not sure that there's anything I could have done to prevent this.
Moon: For what it's worth, I tend to agree. So I think we'd both agree that his feedback does not have merit. Then what do we do?
Sun: Let it go.
Moon: Correct. [Looks down at her Erin Condren planner] You've got about an hour before your next meeting. We're going to consider that time as "personal reflection" for your leadership tracker. [gets up] I'll need the agenda for next week's meeting soon. [walks toward door]
Sun: Luna...you'd be better at this job than I am. You prove it all the time.
Moon: [smiles] That's your bruised ego talking now. Someone tried to knock you off your horse today, Sol. He didn't. A win is a win.
[The Moon opens the door, exits, and gently closes it behind her]
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