Letters from Neptune

Dear Saturn,

John asked me to send along periodic updates to let you know that you have not been forgotten during his quest to finish his book. He still really does like you, although some days I wonder why.

Anyway, so far he’s done four of the 78 tarot cards. That’s a pretty good start. He’s completely changed how he’s writing this book: No formula, no structure, no nothing. Just writing. And that’s what he needs to do. You’re doing a great job of—well, doing nothing. So keep up the good work.

I have another more personal reason for writing. I know you and I are opposed and we’re never going to agree when it comes to John. But at least we can act civilly. Your sense of responsibility is strong with John, Old Man, but you’ve got to let go of him sometime. Ask Uranus how he feels; for the first time in John’s life, Uranus is in Aries, opposite of where it was when John was born. He’s as unpredictable as hell, and with him sitting in Aries—the ultimate ME ME ME sign—it’s a great time for John to push the envelope.

You can sit there on your high horse and you can go on and on about how important you are to him. But don’t forget that when John was in college, he thought about me an awful lot—at one point he was doing like four different musical groups—and I know I don’t have the pull that you have, but it’s nice to have him back for a while.

And I remember what you said about being disappointed that Jen wasn’t a Cappie girl. Let me tell you that I was THRILLED when John started dating Jen. Now there was a fantastic musician. What a singing voice she had, and she used to play Chopin on the piano too. And the creative streak on this girl is a mile wide—she crafts, she sews, she designs jewelry, she writes books—and that makes me feel all warm inside. But she’s got Capricorn rising so she puts all of that to good, solid, practical, Saturnian use. Yes, she’s no goat girl, but she’s the perfect combination of both of us, and she’ll make sure he gets this book done. So you have no reason to be disappointed.

I’m sure we’ll have plenty of time to chat over the next few months, so I think I’ll sign off and go embrace my feminine side. Or do tequila shots. Or meditate. Or maybe all three.

Believe,

Neptune

PS: If you want to get in on the betting pool Uranus has cooked up, he’s giving decent odds that the Libyan rebels will overthrow Gaddafi; the over under is a year. Think about it!