There is No "War on Christmas" For Me

Merry Christmas to all!

It seems like this time of year is when we start hearing in the media about the "war on Christmas", and frankly, I'm kind of sick of it.

I can understand people thinking that the religious/spiritual meaning has gone out of Christmas. For many people it's about spending money and making money. And there's nothing wrong with either of those two things; everyone has different ideas about what they get out of the holiday. But I can understand people being upset about that. 

With that said, it isn't what we're talking about, really. The distinct impression I get when I hear about the "war on Christmas" is that people are upset that people of other faiths are starting to push back against the idea that we're not all Christians, and that many of us do not celebrate Christmas as a religious holiday. 

One of the manifestations of this phenomenon is the idea that you can somehow offend people with "Merry Christmas!" Since you don't know what faith everyone is, you can't necessarily greet them appropriately for their spiritual path. And what about atheists? Dan Piraro, the creator of the Bizarro comic, has two atheists greeting each other with "Happy Nothing!", which I found hilarious. But I digress. 

If someone wishes me "Merry Christmas", I take that as "I hope you have a great holiday, whichever one it is you celebrate at this time of year." I find it makes me feel good and doesn't piss people off, and I know deep down that people are wishing me well. Not everyone knows I'm a witch and I don't feel the need to advertise it, so I don't correct people and say, "No...it's 'Blessed Yule'!"

(For the record, more and more people are recognizing Wicca/Witchcraft, so I often get messages from friends wishing me well for the solstices and the other holidays. I'm always extremely impressed and grateful!)

Other than the whole "Merry Christmas" thing, I'm not sure what the "war" is about. If you mean that people should be able to put up nativity scenes and other faiths should be able to construct and publicly display symbols of their faith, I'm all for it. Everyone, from Wiccans to atheists to Satanists and every other group, should be able to put up displays at public buildings. Or no group should be allowed to do so. That's only fair. 

I think that many Christians are starting to get nervous that their faith is losing ground in the United States. I'm not sure why that would make people upset; your faith is your faith no matter how many people practice it. What other people say doesn't affect what you believe, does it? Christianity is one of the world's strongest and largest faiths, so I'm not sure how others expressing their religious beliefs threatens them. 

If you really believe there's a "war on Christmas", then perhaps you should look within and ask yourself why other people wanting to express their beliefs has a negative impact on your own.  To push this idea forward smacks of intolerance, which is just unacceptable.

My Christmas wish for us all is acceptance. If you can accept that the beliefs of others have nothing to do with you; and that when someone wishes you well, even if it's not of your personal spiritual path, you can accept it as a kind wish, you're already in good shape for 2015.

Best wishes for a prosperous, peaceful, and healthy 2015. 

Apologies

Please accept my apologies for the last two blogs. Once again, I tried to make those planets in my chart work together. Both Neptune and Jupiter have oppositions to Saturn for me, and I find that writing about them helps me balance their energies in my own life. 

First things first: I didn't authorize Jupiter to be anywhere near this blog for the reasons you saw and many more. Don't get me wrong...he's an amazing guy to hang out with but he does get really carried away. When he knew he'd be going up against Saturn of course he lost his mind. Getting those two to get along in my own life is a pain. 

I think it may be best here to give you an example or two. Jupiter rules expansion...and he's in a very strong position in my chart, in his rulership in Sagittarius (a sign he rules). His energy flows easily in me. Jupiter is expansion on a physical level; I've never been a small man, and Jupiter loves to eat too much. Saturn is Jupiter's foil and deals with self-discipline. When I channel him, I lose weight very easily and feel bad about eating anything bad for me. Sometimes I don't eat enough when I'm with Saturn, which doesn't help my overall diet anyway. So my weight very much depends on whose energy I happen to be working with more.

Personality-wise, you've heard about Silent John. He's a Saturn construct for sure. He's about as much of an old curmudgeon as you can get. He doesn't want to be around people and he doesn't want to interact with them. Jupiter is the opposite. He's outgoing and very friendly...sometimes too friendly. He wants to be around others and, while not as much of an attention hog as the Sun, he's the teacher of the astrological planets, so he wants to lead groups and share his knowledge. When I channel Saturn in the classroom, think of the most strict teacher you've had, and that's him in a nutshell; he's not mean but he's a hardass, a real tough bastard who gives away nothing for free. He came in really handy when I was teaching high school. At the Tradition of the Witches Circle, I'm learning how to rein him in. 

And that, dear readers, is what life is about: Taking the hand you're dealt astrologically and making it work in your life for your benefit and success. Sure, I'd rather these planets be best buddies, but that's not going to happen and it's kind of good that it doesn't. In charts where the planets get along easily, there is less tension but people tend to be lazier. I guess I'll take the tension and try to work through the nonsense. 

Anyway, I'd like to take a moment to wish you well this time of year, no matter what holiday(s) you choose to celebrate. I'd also like to take a moment to remind you that tarot readings and astrology charts make fantastic holiday gifts. While I have a long way to go to becoming the astrological expert I would like to be (Saturn), I'm happy to share the knowledge I have with you (Jupiter), or use my intuitive gifts to give you some insight (Neptune). Wow, it's almost as if I planned that... :)

To my clients and students, thank you for your trust and confidence. I am honored and humbled, and it is my pleasure to serve you!

Christmas Greeting Rebuttal from Neptune...and Jupiter?

Neptune: Hello everyone! Neptune here. John gave me the opportunity to write this blog, but since I'm sort of busy at the moment helping many of you deal with the holidaze through writing bad poetry and drinking, Jupiter offered to give me a hand in wishing you well. Take it away, good sir!

Jupiter: Thanks, Neptune! I'm thrilled to be here today!

What many people may not know is that in John's chart I am an even closer opposition to Saturn than you are, Neptune. So I've got even more reason to hate that [OFFENSIVE CONTENT DELETED BY BLOG AUTHOR] than Neptune does. Did he really think that was wishing you WELL? As far as I'm concerned, you can take that blog that Saturn wrote and [OFFENSIVE CONTENT INVOLVING THE LOWER DIGESTIVE TRACT DELETED BY BLOG AUTHOR].

Anyway, coming from someone who rules the sign we're currently transiting through--WHOOP WHOOP, ARCHERS!!!--I think this is the best time of year. People really let loose...they buy too much, they drink too much, and they eat too much. AND SO WHAT? If that [EXPLETIVE] ever even enjoyed life for a change, you never know what could happen. But no, Saturn's gotta sit up there like a [OFFENSIVE CONTENT DELETED BY BLOG AUTHOR] and judge everyone, like usual. Once the New Year comes around everyone can straighten up and fly right, and that's the way it's always been. (It's interesting that Saturn rules the ENTIRE MONTH where the most divorces occur, isn't it? There's a reason for that! No one can stand him!)

Nobody gives me credit for anything these days. I mean come the [EXPLETIVE] on! When good luck finds it's way to you, that's me at work, that great run at the craps table or that sweet promotion at the office. And I rule over partying and having a great time. Who wouldn't love being around me? Sure I have a spiritual side, that's true...and this time of year people embrace that, too. But I'm all about expansion. And when it comes to late November to the solstice, I'm all about expanding the fun. If I expand a few waistlines in the process...I'm not worried!

As far as John goes, don't listen to that [OFFENSIVE, DEMEANING CONTENT ABOUT SATURN DELETED]! You need to check out his tarot and astrology services for the holidaze! An astrological chart or solar return makes a great gift, as does a gift certificate for a tarot reading. He is extremely talented, and he's got Jupiter in Sagittarius--that's my RULERSHIP, BABY!--so he's very ambitious and is always learning more. No, he's not a Sag or Pisces, but he's a pretty amazing guy, for a Scorpio.

What are you still doing reading this blog? Get the [EXPLETIVE] out of here, [OFFENSIVE COMMENTARY ABOUT SATURN DELETED], and GO HAVE A GOOD TIME! YOLO, good people, YOLO! I'm OUT! [DROPS MIC].

Restrained Holiday Greetings from Saturn

Greetings of the season to all of you.

I'm thankful to John for giving me the opportunity to write this blog. Originally, Neptune and I were supposed to write it together, but of course, our views on the season are not, shall we say, compatible, despite John's many and varied attempts to have us work in harmony together. So John reluctantly agreed to allow me to pen this one on my own, provided I don't throw any invective Neptune's way. 

Speaking personally, I certainly expect that Neptune will likely have his say, and I expect John to ensure that he plays by the same rules as I am. To quote a famous movie and it's just as well, "That's all I have to say about that."

For his part, John been particularly lax about writing lately, and he's definitely put on some weight, but that's not because I haven't been reminding him to write, go to the gym, and eat less. Anyway, none of that is important right now. If John minds that I shared all that with you, I'll have to make my apologies to him. But I digress.

What is important at this time of year are the virtues that I instill, or try to, in all of you, but they become vital in this season of "merriment". I've never really seen the point of all this partying myself, but as a personal favor to me, I'd like you to make sure it doesn't get too out of control. So I'm asking this year for you to be particularly careful by abiding by the following rules.

1) Show self-restraint in all that you do, whether it be food, alcohol, or dress. An in-control person is a happy person.
2) Please act fiscally responsible. I know many of you overspend (Jupiter's influence, no doubt) and it's just not a smart idea to open up your credit card bills in January and realize what a huge mistake you've made. How about things that are well-made but less expensive this holiday season? If you're going to splurge a little bit, which I highly discourage, please buy from local small businesses.
3) Be modest in all things. Accept congratulations and greetings of the season with the appropriate decorum and respect.

There is a fourth point that John asked me to mention, but since it appears to be a distasteful attempt at shamelessly marketing his tarot and astrology services this holiday season, I feel I am duty-bound to ignore it. He doesn't seem to realize that his services, while entertaining and mildly interesting in a plebeian sort of way, foster a belief in the otherworldly, and many people would rather ask for guidance from stars or cards than use self-discipline to guide their lives. If people lived in blissful moderation in all things, instead of excess, they wouldn't need his services at all. This is the same man reading a book entitled "Saturn: A New Look at an Old Devil"! IMAGINE! 

Actually, when it comes to astrology, John doesn't know half of what you think he does, so why would you consult him, anyway? [I expect this last statement to be censored in the final draft of this blog. I'll have to hit SEND before he sees it.]

Once again, I hope you will hear and follow my guidance toward self-restraint and modesty this holiday season, no matter whose holiday you choose to celebrate. You will thank me in January when it's time for the all-important New Years' resolutions.

Very truly yours,

Saturn

PS: Despite what some astrologers may say, like the one who runs this blog, I am not as much of a prick as everyone thinks I am. 

PPS: If you choose to celebrate Saturnalia, well...I hope you'll keep me in it. Thanks in advance for your support. 

Letter From Neptune: Enjoying the Holidaze

Dear John...

Another Christmas is here, and already people around the world are riding with me! It's pretty cool but also a little bit scary.

Alcohol consumption and therapy are both in my purview, and it's facsinating to me that many people spend the holidays self-medicating both ways. It's not a problem on both counts when neither are taken to an extreme, though. What I find really interesting is that people end up spending the holiday with most of the people who were involved in causing the difficulties in the first place. Why that is I have no idea. Maybe people are trying to deal with their problems head-on, and that's more of a Mars way of handling the situation. I'm more of an "avoid the problems" type; it always seems to work for me.

Anyway, enjoy your Mike's Hard Lemonade and have a fantastic day! Hope it won't be the subject of any therapy sessions later. 

Believe,

Neptune