Opportunities to Excel in 2020: Three Ideas to Ponder

Greetings good people! Another end of the year is upon us.

I don't know about you, but I'm glad to see 2019 leave. It's been a challenging year for me in many ways. But it's too easy to say "Good riddance!" and stop there. 

Honestly, 2020 will give us what we need: Opportunities to excel. So how can you exceed your expectations in 2020? Here are three ideas for your consideration. 

1) Lead from where you stand

Most people hear this and think, "That sounds like it's for work." You're not wrong; the idea of being a leader in what you do no matter what your title may dictate is not new in the realm of employment. But it's greater than that. It's a reminder that you need to lead your own life. 

Blaming others is the easy way out, and so is playing the victim or procrastinating. We all live with our own choices, folks, and we have all had to deal with unexpected conditions that crop up and seem to mess everything up. 

Life is full of difficult situations, dilemmas and decisions. In 2020, decide to own it all: your decisions, your opinions, your thoughts, and most importantly, your actions or the lack thereof. If you've been putting things off out of fear, face them head on.

For me, there will be a greater focus on leadership and on helping others to lead from where they stand. I've taught some amazing students over the past year and I hope to have more of them in the year to come. Helping others helps you and is an investment in your future, and when you light another candle, you are a leader. 

I'll leave you with this important fact from a dear friend: When you are helping someone, you are supporting them until they can get to a place where they can help themselves. Do that wherever you can and you show leadership. 

2) Embrace hope

Many of us have experienced hardship in the past year: Divorce, financial difficulties, aging parents, medical problems that require lifestyle changes, and the loss of people or companion animals are just a few of them. 

What's more is that this world is screwed up in many ways, and we receive constant reminders. We hear about things that have gone wrong constantly. Our current political climate only seems to make things worse as it features so much in our headlines. It seems like an escape from it is more necessary now than ever. 

So how do you handle all this without becoming overwhelmed? Embrace hope. Believe that the world can be a better place. Accept that you have control only over your very small corner of the world, but by improving your own little portion, you have a positive impact. Even an optimistic attitude can help. 

Some days it's very challenging to look through what many might call rose-colored glasses. But I see the good in people every day, and it's a practice from which we can all benefit, I suspect. 

And believe me, the world is a much better place with you in it. Please reach out for help if you feel that you've lost all hope. As I recently said to a friend, I've done too many hospital visits in the past year, and I don't want to write your eulogy.

3) Learn to speak in public in spite of fear

73% of Americans are afraid of speaking in public. No, I'm not joking...this is the #1 fear of so many adults. The statistics I saw say that both death and loneliness are in the top ten fears, but presenting to others tops them all.

I've been teaching public speaking for a number of years so when I say I get it, I really do. No one wants to mess up, and no one wants to make an idiot out of themselves in front of their friends, colleagues, and bosses.

I used to fear speaking in public and also performing in public as a musician. Hell, I used to fear talking on the telephone! But after a less than stellar musical performance where nerves got the better of me, I decided this fear was not going to hold me back. 

So I put myself into positions deliberately where I would have to speak and it has paid off. It's given me more confidence in front of groups and in one-on-one conversations like job interviews, and I found to my incredible surprise that I really enjoy it, too. The nervous energy is there but I've learned to harness it and make it work for me. 

My challenge for you this year is to give it a try. Start small: Present an idea at a meeting at work. Speak at your house of worship or a local community group. Share your ideas with others at a conference. Hustle up to the microphone at your town meeting. It doesn't have to last a long time, but it's important to face that fear. 

Chances are you won't "enjoy" public speaking. But it can help you a lot if you're willing to give it a shot.

If you find yourself wanting to learn to present, I'm taking new mentees this year and would love to hear from you. Recently I helped a young lady prepare for job interviews, and I enjoyed the experience so much that I'd love to do more of that work, no matter what your public speaking goal may be. 

No matter what you do with 2020, I hope you will choose to lead from where you stand, embrace hope, and get out there and speak your truth. I look forward to witnessing your progress. 

The View from Saturn: Restating the Rules

A very pleasant good evening to one and all. 

Those of you who know me well know that I rarely show my emotions on the surface. I prefer it that way, and my feelings--few as they may be--are a private matter for no one else. 

But I come before you, dear friends, with a sense of the most profound disappointment. 

I spend precious little time on frivolities, such as entertainment, television, and the Internet and the social media circus that it has become. I barely know how to use any sort of technology, preferring the beautiful scraping of the sharpened #2 pencil on paper to any of that nonsense. And even though Mercury will be turning retrograde shortly and generally is an unreliable planet, I do thank him for the postal service through which I can send John my many epistles.

[As a side note, for those of you hoping for more news about Mercury and his usual thrice-yearly retrograde nonsense, I'm sure John will be writing about it any moment now to stoke your anxieties and give you something to blame besides your own insignificant efforts.]

To be frank, "mail" was just fine before it was "electronic", although many of you have forgotten the fine art of putting pen to paper in the literal sense. Many of you might say "IRL" in this context, but since I have plenty of sharpened writing instruments and have placed my work "smartphone" in a small locker where it has no power and no way to receive or transmit a signal, I lack a need for such...modern writing conventions. And I have never understood why the concept of writing letters is now associated with assorted shelled gastropods, and its modern electronic cousin with ground, shaped pork and ham in a can of all things, but I digress. 

Even in my deliberately sheltered world of bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens, I can no longer remain silent about the news that has repeatedly reached my ears since Jupiter, the horniest bastard of them all, has moved into sexual Scorpio: That some humans possessed of a Y chromosome feel the need to routinely violate the boundaries other human beings, mainly those with two X chromosomes.

Frankly, I am deeply offended that I even have to repeat these rules of behavior, but since it has become necessary to reiterate them, I will try to express them as simply as I can: 

1) The only person that you have the right to touch is yourself. Anyone else requires consent, and ideally, an invitation or other indication that said individual welcomes that contact.

2) Your desire to have contact with another person does not under any circumstances negate the other person's right to refuse that contact. Your intentions for initiating said contact are completely irrelevant.

3) No matter what your position in any hierarchy, no matter the size of the organization, your power, authority, position, influence, or other marks of status do not entitle you to touch any person without their consent.

SPECIAL NOTE: "Any person" also includes any unborn fetus gestating inside a female's body. In that case, the female carrying the fetus may choose to give you consent to touch her stomach. You are not, however, entitled to do so; a child in utero is NOT considered community property. Would you want your offspring contaminated with the germs of the unwashed hands of strangers? I should say not!

4) A person's attire, age, race, culture, gender, sexuality, sexual preference, religion, marital status, or hierarchical position in relationship to you does not entitle you to touch them. None of the aforementioned factors are considered an invitation for any contact whatsoever unless the individual's consent is given.

5) If one party in a two-person situation cannot for some reason consent, then it is the obligation of the second person to cease and desist the activity immediately if it is in progress, or to delay initiation of said activity, until the other party does give consent.

True leadership comes with many obligations. One of the main duties of any leader is to put aside his or her personal desires in favor of those in his or her charge and the organization as a whole. Any leader who takes advantage of his or her position to pursue their own agenda with someone for whom s/he is responsible is absolutely unworthy of the title and should face immediate consequences, not the least of which should be the loss of a leadership position and a tarnishing of their reputation. This, of course, does not preclude the possibility of civil or criminal prosecution, and continual repetition of the offender's crimes on the Internet through text, video, and news reporting. It is a small price to pay for the humiliation, shame, and degradation that your activity has visited upon another human being!

You should know that in under three weeks now, I will be entering Capricorn, one of my most favored signs. Let me also remind you that I am the planet of karma. I shouldn't need to warn you of the consequences of violating the aforementioned boundaries, but it seemed like a clear reminder of what is at stake is necessary for some of you. I am also a big fan of repeating important messages until retention occurs.

John has allowed me to detail my activities for the next year, but those will come at a later date. I've requested for my thoughts to appear on the solstice, but John will make the final decision. 

For now, heed my warning carefully and respect the boundaries of all people.   

If you think things are serious now, just wait a few weeks. I'm coming back to Capricorn after a long hiatus and will set things right. There are a million things I haven't done. Just you wait; just you wait!

Respectfully, 

Saturn

Saturn Returns, Part 1: Lessons in Leadership for the Sun

Moon: Good morning, Saturn. The Sun will see you now.

Saturn: [coldly] Thank you, Lady Moon. 

Moon: I'm sorry you're upset. [smile] I hope Sol can help you understand. It's been a weird few months since you've been gone.

Saturn: I think that's a safe assumption, Lady Moon. Your dedication to duty is admirable.

Moon: If I didn't know you better, Saturn, I'd almost take that as a compliment. Please go inside. 

[Saturn knocks on the Sun's office door]

Sun: [from behind door] Come on in, Saturn. [Saturn opens door] Make yourself at home...I've put out the chair you like. 

Saturn: Thank you, sir.

Sun: It's hard as a rock but you do enjoy it. 

Saturn: I got your note, sir. Thanks for taking the time to see me. 

Sun: I should know better than to try pleasantries with you, Saturn. They're more for my benefit than yours. 

Saturn: Well, since you know me so well, sir, you should have understood how I was going to perceive a handwritten note telling me to come see you at the earliest possible opportunity. 

Sun: That's a fair point, Saturn. I wanted the opportunity to explain to you what happened during your absence and to extend my apologies to you.

Saturn: With all due respect, sir, I'd like to start with how someone was allowed access to my office.

Sun: Yes, I suppose you would. Your boundaries have been violated, and for that you have my sincere apologies. [Pause] We had a little bit of a strange situation here around the 4th of July involving explosives. 

Saturn: [straightens in his chair] I see. Go on, please. 

Sun: As does sometimes occur, each planet in his or her own way does sort of get...out of bounds from time to time. And in this case I'm talking in the "carried away" sense, and not in the sense of declination, if you take my meaning.

Saturn: [slowly nods]

Sun: In this particular case, one of your colleagues decided that at this...ummm, festive, time of year, it would be funny to play pranks on other members of the team. 

Saturn: Using explosives. 

Sun: Yes. Typically in the other incidents bang caps were used. In your case, the incendiary devices were more powerful.

Saturn: You are aware, sir, that under section 75 of the Astrological...

Sun: [holds up his hand] Old Man, it's been a rough summer. I appreciate your dedication to protocol, but please do NOT quote the rule book for me. Believe me, I've read it enough times in the past 12 weeks to realize that to many people, rules, no matter what form they take--guidelines, laws, or social cues--are to be ignored. So to summarize, I'm aware of the statute.

Saturn: So...someone blew my office door...up? Off? I'm not sure which was is totally correct, but that doesn't take away the hurtfulness of the act.

Sun: I understand and appreciate how you must feel about this.  Jupiter placed your order in your office only because the door was already compromised. The point I want to make clear to you is that there was no deliberate attempt made by anyone to access your space.

Saturn: I'm not even sure what that really means. Did anyone else have their boundaries violated?

Sun: Not to the extent that yours were. But most everyone was affected in a similar, albeit less destructive, fashion.

Saturn: And has the perpetrator of this heinous act been caught?

Sun: Will it make you feel better if I say yes?

Saturn: Feeling "better" for me is irrelevant, but I might be slightly mollified if justice has been served.

Sun: Then yes.

Saturn: You understand that I hold you personally responsible for allowing this conduct to occur, sir.

Sun: Of course I do, Saturn. I knew you would from the moment the incident occurred. At that time, using the authority vested in me, I performed a complete investigation and meted out punishment to the guilty party.

Saturn: Excuse me if I'm not impressed by your "authority", since it does not appear to have prevented the damage to my property in the first place!

Sun: [SIGH] This is getting tedious. You're getting an explanation and more detail than you should only out of respect for your many years of dedicated service. But if you think I'll allow you to disparage me or my title, you are mistaken. And I think you owe me an apology for that last remark, as unprofessional as it was.

Saturn: It's my sad duty to inform you that unfortunately, sir, you won't be getting one. What I want is for my door to be repaired and to return to work. That's it.

Sun: [hands Saturn a small brown envelope] Here are the keys to your new office door, Saturn. Just before you questioned my ability to lead earlier, I was going to tell you that as part of the penalty the perpetrator paid for a even sturdier door to ensure that this particular incident does not recur.

Saturn: You have my gratitude, sir.

Sun: Our appointment is over, Saturn. I'll see you at our next meeting.

Saturn: Yes, sir. [gets up and leaves]

[Moon enters and closes the Sun's office door]

Moon: Sol...

Sun: Luna, I'm so angry I can't even speak.

Moon: Teachable moment time, then. What are we supposed to do with feedback?

Sun: Luna, this is hardly the time...

Moon: Bullshit. You need to hear this message, Sol. As a servant leader, what are YOU supposed to do with feedback?

Sun: [SIGH] Consider it, even if the source is toxic.

Moon: Correct. And then?

Sun: Decide whether or not it has any merit.

Moon: And in this case...does it have merit?

Sun: [shouting] FROM THAT MOTHER FUCKING PROTOCOL-FOLLOWING JUDGEMENTAL SONOFABITCH? He has NO IDEA what it's like to try to lead these planets!

Moon: That's your ego talking. He's the eptiome of toxic, Sol. Answer the question, please.

Sun: [PAUSE] Honestly, I'm not sure that there's anything I could have done to prevent this.

Moon: For what it's worth, I tend to agree. So I think we'd both agree that his feedback does not have merit. Then what do we do?

Sun: Let it go.

Moon: Correct. [Looks down at her Erin Condren planner] You've got about an hour before your next meeting. We're going to consider that time as "personal reflection" for your leadership tracker. [gets up] I'll need the agenda for next week's meeting soon. [walks toward door]

Sun: Luna...you'd be better at this job than I am. You prove it all the time.

Moon: [smiles] That's your bruised ego talking now. Someone tried to knock you off your horse today, Sol. He didn't. A win is a win.

[The Moon opens the door, exits, and gently closes it behind her]