The View from Saturn: Restating the Rules

A very pleasant good evening to one and all. 

Those of you who know me well know that I rarely show my emotions on the surface. I prefer it that way, and my feelings--few as they may be--are a private matter for no one else. 

But I come before you, dear friends, with a sense of the most profound disappointment. 

I spend precious little time on frivolities, such as entertainment, television, and the Internet and the social media circus that it has become. I barely know how to use any sort of technology, preferring the beautiful scraping of the sharpened #2 pencil on paper to any of that nonsense. And even though Mercury will be turning retrograde shortly and generally is an unreliable planet, I do thank him for the postal service through which I can send John my many epistles.

[As a side note, for those of you hoping for more news about Mercury and his usual thrice-yearly retrograde nonsense, I'm sure John will be writing about it any moment now to stoke your anxieties and give you something to blame besides your own insignificant efforts.]

To be frank, "mail" was just fine before it was "electronic", although many of you have forgotten the fine art of putting pen to paper in the literal sense. Many of you might say "IRL" in this context, but since I have plenty of sharpened writing instruments and have placed my work "smartphone" in a small locker where it has no power and no way to receive or transmit a signal, I lack a need for such...modern writing conventions. And I have never understood why the concept of writing letters is now associated with assorted shelled gastropods, and its modern electronic cousin with ground, shaped pork and ham in a can of all things, but I digress. 

Even in my deliberately sheltered world of bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens, I can no longer remain silent about the news that has repeatedly reached my ears since Jupiter, the horniest bastard of them all, has moved into sexual Scorpio: That some humans possessed of a Y chromosome feel the need to routinely violate the boundaries other human beings, mainly those with two X chromosomes.

Frankly, I am deeply offended that I even have to repeat these rules of behavior, but since it has become necessary to reiterate them, I will try to express them as simply as I can: 

1) The only person that you have the right to touch is yourself. Anyone else requires consent, and ideally, an invitation or other indication that said individual welcomes that contact.

2) Your desire to have contact with another person does not under any circumstances negate the other person's right to refuse that contact. Your intentions for initiating said contact are completely irrelevant.

3) No matter what your position in any hierarchy, no matter the size of the organization, your power, authority, position, influence, or other marks of status do not entitle you to touch any person without their consent.

SPECIAL NOTE: "Any person" also includes any unborn fetus gestating inside a female's body. In that case, the female carrying the fetus may choose to give you consent to touch her stomach. You are not, however, entitled to do so; a child in utero is NOT considered community property. Would you want your offspring contaminated with the germs of the unwashed hands of strangers? I should say not!

4) A person's attire, age, race, culture, gender, sexuality, sexual preference, religion, marital status, or hierarchical position in relationship to you does not entitle you to touch them. None of the aforementioned factors are considered an invitation for any contact whatsoever unless the individual's consent is given.

5) If one party in a two-person situation cannot for some reason consent, then it is the obligation of the second person to cease and desist the activity immediately if it is in progress, or to delay initiation of said activity, until the other party does give consent.

True leadership comes with many obligations. One of the main duties of any leader is to put aside his or her personal desires in favor of those in his or her charge and the organization as a whole. Any leader who takes advantage of his or her position to pursue their own agenda with someone for whom s/he is responsible is absolutely unworthy of the title and should face immediate consequences, not the least of which should be the loss of a leadership position and a tarnishing of their reputation. This, of course, does not preclude the possibility of civil or criminal prosecution, and continual repetition of the offender's crimes on the Internet through text, video, and news reporting. It is a small price to pay for the humiliation, shame, and degradation that your activity has visited upon another human being!

You should know that in under three weeks now, I will be entering Capricorn, one of my most favored signs. Let me also remind you that I am the planet of karma. I shouldn't need to warn you of the consequences of violating the aforementioned boundaries, but it seemed like a clear reminder of what is at stake is necessary for some of you. I am also a big fan of repeating important messages until retention occurs.

John has allowed me to detail my activities for the next year, but those will come at a later date. I've requested for my thoughts to appear on the solstice, but John will make the final decision. 

For now, heed my warning carefully and respect the boundaries of all people.   

If you think things are serious now, just wait a few weeks. I'm coming back to Capricorn after a long hiatus and will set things right. There are a million things I haven't done. Just you wait; just you wait!

Respectfully, 

Saturn

Saturn Returns, Part 1: Lessons in Leadership for the Sun

Moon: Good morning, Saturn. The Sun will see you now.

Saturn: [coldly] Thank you, Lady Moon. 

Moon: I'm sorry you're upset. [smile] I hope Sol can help you understand. It's been a weird few months since you've been gone.

Saturn: I think that's a safe assumption, Lady Moon. Your dedication to duty is admirable.

Moon: If I didn't know you better, Saturn, I'd almost take that as a compliment. Please go inside. 

[Saturn knocks on the Sun's office door]

Sun: [from behind door] Come on in, Saturn. [Saturn opens door] Make yourself at home...I've put out the chair you like. 

Saturn: Thank you, sir.

Sun: It's hard as a rock but you do enjoy it. 

Saturn: I got your note, sir. Thanks for taking the time to see me. 

Sun: I should know better than to try pleasantries with you, Saturn. They're more for my benefit than yours. 

Saturn: Well, since you know me so well, sir, you should have understood how I was going to perceive a handwritten note telling me to come see you at the earliest possible opportunity. 

Sun: That's a fair point, Saturn. I wanted the opportunity to explain to you what happened during your absence and to extend my apologies to you.

Saturn: With all due respect, sir, I'd like to start with how someone was allowed access to my office.

Sun: Yes, I suppose you would. Your boundaries have been violated, and for that you have my sincere apologies. [Pause] We had a little bit of a strange situation here around the 4th of July involving explosives. 

Saturn: [straightens in his chair] I see. Go on, please. 

Sun: As does sometimes occur, each planet in his or her own way does sort of get...out of bounds from time to time. And in this case I'm talking in the "carried away" sense, and not in the sense of declination, if you take my meaning.

Saturn: [slowly nods]

Sun: In this particular case, one of your colleagues decided that at this...ummm, festive, time of year, it would be funny to play pranks on other members of the team. 

Saturn: Using explosives. 

Sun: Yes. Typically in the other incidents bang caps were used. In your case, the incendiary devices were more powerful.

Saturn: You are aware, sir, that under section 75 of the Astrological...

Sun: [holds up his hand] Old Man, it's been a rough summer. I appreciate your dedication to protocol, but please do NOT quote the rule book for me. Believe me, I've read it enough times in the past 12 weeks to realize that to many people, rules, no matter what form they take--guidelines, laws, or social cues--are to be ignored. So to summarize, I'm aware of the statute.

Saturn: So...someone blew my office door...up? Off? I'm not sure which was is totally correct, but that doesn't take away the hurtfulness of the act.

Sun: I understand and appreciate how you must feel about this.  Jupiter placed your order in your office only because the door was already compromised. The point I want to make clear to you is that there was no deliberate attempt made by anyone to access your space.

Saturn: I'm not even sure what that really means. Did anyone else have their boundaries violated?

Sun: Not to the extent that yours were. But most everyone was affected in a similar, albeit less destructive, fashion.

Saturn: And has the perpetrator of this heinous act been caught?

Sun: Will it make you feel better if I say yes?

Saturn: Feeling "better" for me is irrelevant, but I might be slightly mollified if justice has been served.

Sun: Then yes.

Saturn: You understand that I hold you personally responsible for allowing this conduct to occur, sir.

Sun: Of course I do, Saturn. I knew you would from the moment the incident occurred. At that time, using the authority vested in me, I performed a complete investigation and meted out punishment to the guilty party.

Saturn: Excuse me if I'm not impressed by your "authority", since it does not appear to have prevented the damage to my property in the first place!

Sun: [SIGH] This is getting tedious. You're getting an explanation and more detail than you should only out of respect for your many years of dedicated service. But if you think I'll allow you to disparage me or my title, you are mistaken. And I think you owe me an apology for that last remark, as unprofessional as it was.

Saturn: It's my sad duty to inform you that unfortunately, sir, you won't be getting one. What I want is for my door to be repaired and to return to work. That's it.

Sun: [hands Saturn a small brown envelope] Here are the keys to your new office door, Saturn. Just before you questioned my ability to lead earlier, I was going to tell you that as part of the penalty the perpetrator paid for a even sturdier door to ensure that this particular incident does not recur.

Saturn: You have my gratitude, sir.

Sun: Our appointment is over, Saturn. I'll see you at our next meeting.

Saturn: Yes, sir. [gets up and leaves]

[Moon enters and closes the Sun's office door]

Moon: Sol...

Sun: Luna, I'm so angry I can't even speak.

Moon: Teachable moment time, then. What are we supposed to do with feedback?

Sun: Luna, this is hardly the time...

Moon: Bullshit. You need to hear this message, Sol. As a servant leader, what are YOU supposed to do with feedback?

Sun: [SIGH] Consider it, even if the source is toxic.

Moon: Correct. And then?

Sun: Decide whether or not it has any merit.

Moon: And in this case...does it have merit?

Sun: [shouting] FROM THAT MOTHER FUCKING PROTOCOL-FOLLOWING JUDGEMENTAL SONOFABITCH? He has NO IDEA what it's like to try to lead these planets!

Moon: That's your ego talking. He's the eptiome of toxic, Sol. Answer the question, please.

Sun: [PAUSE] Honestly, I'm not sure that there's anything I could have done to prevent this.

Moon: For what it's worth, I tend to agree. So I think we'd both agree that his feedback does not have merit. Then what do we do?

Sun: Let it go.

Moon: Correct. [Looks down at her Erin Condren planner] You've got about an hour before your next meeting. We're going to consider that time as "personal reflection" for your leadership tracker. [gets up] I'll need the agenda for next week's meeting soon. [walks toward door]

Sun: Luna...you'd be better at this job than I am. You prove it all the time.

Moon: [smiles] That's your bruised ego talking now. Someone tried to knock you off your horse today, Sol. He didn't. A win is a win.

[The Moon opens the door, exits, and gently closes it behind her] 

Update: Kenny Klein Convicted of Child Pornography Charges

Hello everyone...

Back in 2014, I wrote this blog about Kenny Klein, a Wiccan minister accused of child pornography. 

Please read the article, but here's the bottom line: Kenny Klein was found guilty of 20 counts of child pornography and could face an incredible amount of jail time. 

I am thrilled to see justice in this case, and I really hope he never sees the light of day again for what he's done.

There is no place in any spiritual path for a leader like this. Not now. Not ever. 

Book Review: "In the Company of Sages: The Journey of the Spiritual Seeker" by Greg Bogart

Spiritual enlightenment is something that many of us seek, and throughout our lives we are looking to others to help us along the way. If one of my clients asked me, “How do I find a spiritual teacher or guide?” I honestly wouldn’t know where to begin. Luckily, Greg Bogart’s book, In the Company of Sages: The Journey of a Spiritual Seeker, can help people find the right teacher.

This process is much more complicated than it seems, however, and Bogart does a great job of bringing his own experiences on his personal journey into the entire work. He draws from many different spiritual paths of both Eastern and Western spirituality and mysticism, so you don’t necessarily have to be familiar with one particular way of doing things.

One of the challenges of reading this book for me was its length. At 280 pages, not including the glossary, extensive bibliography—the entire book is thoroughly sourced—and an index, it can seem rather intimidating. The author uses plenty of stories and details to paint an extremely vivid picture of his own search for a guru. While autobiographical, the book is very objective and is far more than just a collection of spiritual stories.

Bogart has compiled a cogent work that delineates this entire process into nine distinct stages, from choosing a teacher, through the process of learning from one, testing, awakening, separating from the teacher, and then becoming a teacher to others.

One portion of the book that I didn’t necessarily agree with was the secrecy of the initiation process in Stage Two. Bogart points out that in many cultures, initiation rites were secret to protect them and to make the experience more meaningful. While I can understand and appreciate these points, I think a lot of folks from the west would have difficulty with the idea of a secret initiation ceremony considering the many wrongs that have been done and kept secret by members of the clergy over the years. A ceremony can be meaningful without being secret, and while initiations are not something that just anyone should be able to come and watch, there must be safeguards in place to protect the physical safety and dignity of the seeker.

As a spiritual teacher myself, I found the portions on when to leave a teacher—“Stage Seven: Separating from a Spiritual Teacher”—to be interesting and valuable. Bogart correctly points out that separation from a teacher is inevitable, that the status quo cannot be forever maintained in the relationship. This is actually a good thing, because the student is evolving. Bogart also suggests that those teachers who are most “enlightened” will not attempt to keep their students from leaving. I definitely agree with this last point. When a student is wise enough to decide for himself or herself that it’s time to move on, getting in the way is counterproductive.

This book may not appeal to a lot of people because it is highly specialized, but if you are looking for a book on finding a spiritual teacher, I highly recommend this one. It reminded me of the Nikos Kazantzakis quote: “True teachers are those who use themselves as bridges over which they invite their students to cross; then, having facilitated their crossing, joyfully collapse, encouraging them to create their own.”

Good Clergy, Part 7: "She Might Have Been Drunk When She Was Consecrated As a Bishop"

You ever wonder how deep the rabbit hole goes? That's what I'm wondering about the case on Heather Elizabeth Cook. 

I'm also wondering how many times I'll have to say "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?" when blogging about this story for someone to say, "Yeah, John. We're just fucking with you. No religious organization worth their salt would allow a person with this kind of history to hold a high office."

I wish I was wrong. 

So NOW it comes out that after the DUI arrest in 2010, during which she did several different kinds of therapy, Ms. Cook was recommended "without hesitation" by the Episcopal Church in Easton to the post of Suffragan. 

Then there was the 2014 meeting in which council participants were "unaware" of Ms. Cook having a DUI or a drinking problem. 

According to the official timeline that came out Monday, Bishop Eugene Sutton now says that he suspected Ms. Cook might have been drunk at her installation festivities last September. This was the party to celebrate her becoming a bishop, and well...she was likely drunk at it. IMAGINE THAT. 

In many organizations, being drunk for a work function would have been an immediate termination, or at the very least a suspension, but not a promotion.

The Washington Post article says that Bishop Sutton conveyed his concerns to the presiding Bishop, Katharine Jefferts Schori, who in turn tells Sutton she's going to meet with Cook. A meeting did occur between them in October, but of course, the details are confidential. I don't have a problem with that; if I had a drinking problem I wouldn't want the world to know by googling it. Ms. Cook certainly has a right to her privacy.

But I'll be honest: I'm trying to wrap my head around this one, folks. I really am. And I'm not calling out the people involved because they're Episcopal, of course. This could and does happen to people of any faith or spiritual path. But it makes the Episcopal Church look pretty bad. 

The signs were ALL THERE, and people who could do something about the problem did NOTHING. You have TONS of evidence to work with, and despite the fact that she has a DUI and has been treated for alcoholism, and four years later is drunk at her installation festivities, Bishop Schori STILL decides it's a good idea to consecrate Heather Elizabeth Cook as a bishop.

Ms. Cook was likely very good at her job. Now I'm all for second chances and forgiveness, but she's no good to anyone as a drunk. The staggering lapses in judgment on the part of Ms. Cook may have been due to her alcoholism, but when all the "leaders" around her look out for themselves and their organization by assuming everything will be fine and not monitoring a recovering alcoholic, they're no longer fit leaders. 

I mean...did you just not SEE it? Or did you choose not to see it? 

Bishop Sutton's revelation--pun intended--pretty much destroys any credibility that the Episcopal Church of Maryland had left. None of Ms. Cook's empty promises in 2010 that her arrest was a major wake-up call or the hollow words of sorrow of Bishop Sutton can bring back Thomas Palermo.

Pray for them all, especially members of the Episcopal Church of Maryland, because they're being led by people who put the Church and their own convenience before the personal safety of others.

Good Clergy, Part 5: Baltimore Sun Reader Calls Out Heather Elizabeth Cook

This letter to the Baltimore Sun sums up perfectly how I feel about this case. A huge kudos to Ms. MacCuaig for having the courage to write it. I've included it here in its entirety.

Episcopal Bishop Suffragan Heather Cook and the tragedy of bicyclist Tom Palermo's accidental death at her hands are the subject of daily news articles, yet the incident has been conspicuously absent from The Sun's letters column ("Bishop Cook posts $2.5M bond, to be released," Jan. 15).

Perhaps there has been a desire, albeit misguided, to protect Ms. Cook given the agony we must assume she is in.

Nevertheless, the news that Judge Nicole Pastore Klein will not reduce her $2.5 million bail at least feels something like justice. The fact that Ms. Cook put herself in treatment at Father Martin's Ashley after the accident is unimpressive.

Ask anyone who has ever had a DUI or other drug offense and you'll find that such a ploy for clemency after the fact is just that — a ploy.

Ms. Cook should have put herself back into rehab years ago.

Instead, she has led what could be called a double, even duplicitous, life: On the one hand preaching and leading within the Episcopal Diocese of Maryland, and on the other indulging alcohol abuse that resulted in extraordinary recklessness and the death of a man who, by all rights, should be alive today.

The carelessness and hypocrisy is overwhelming, and overwhelmingly discouraging. Jail is the appropriate place for her.

Myra MacCuaig, Towson

Good Clergy, Part 4: Heather Elizabeth Cook Posts Bail; Episcopal Church Considers Punishment and Election Process

I'm disappointed to report that Ms. Cook was released from jail on Thursday the 15th. Somehow she actually posted the $2.5 million bond and is on her way to a treatment facility. Luckily for all of us, part of the court's order was that she not drive while she is free, assuming she choose to abide by it. She'll be at a treatment facility and hopefully won't need to drive anywhere.

I disagree with the judge's decision...if it had been her 1st DUI maybe I could see letting her post bail. But for a second involving a fatality? She was also in a position of trust, and to me that merits a stronger punishment.

The Baltimore Sun also reports that the Episcopal Church is considering what punishment to hand down to Ms. Cook. To me this is a no-brainer: She should be defrocked. She killed an innocent person, for fuck's sake. She gave up her right to perform her duties as a member of clergy when she ran into a cyclist and left him at the scene to die. 

To me there's no "deliberation" required. I don't care if she was somehow found innocent of this crime in court, which isn't going to happen anyway; she's done enough damage to her own reputation and that of the Episcopal Church that she can no longer carry out her duties. She's unfit for the clergy. At least 7 people, half of them priests or deacons, will make a recommendation to a board of review, who will hand down the punishment. But honestly, any punishment less than "get the fuck out" is a slap on the wrist for me.

Finally, it appears that the Episcopal Church is looking into the election process. According to the Baltimore Sun, "Church officials say Cook disclosed the charges to a search committee. But they say delegates who voted in the election knew nothing of the charges." The same group that is investigating Cook's case will also be undertaking the review of her election. They will be doing interviews with those who took part in the election, and establish what they knew, as well as with people who worked with Ms. Cook during her time as a priest.

There needs to be complete transparency for there to be healing in this case. I wouldn't be surprised to hear the Episcopal Church put new standards in place to ensure that elections are not only done fairly, but that everyone involved has full knowledge of the facts, especially about the candidates.

Positive thoughts and prayers to them. This is going to be ugly no matter how you slice it. As long as they're open about what they find, and as long as they don't allow Heather Elizabeth Cook to minister to anyone ever again, I think they can be successful.

Good Clergy, Part 3: "...Reckless and Careless Indifference to Life."

More information surfaced yesterday about the case against Heather Elizabeth Cook. Judge Nicole Pastore Klein found a nice balance between the prosecution's request to deny Ms. Cook bail and the defense's request that it be lowered: She kept it at $2.5 million. Her reasoning: That the alleged crimes show a "reckless and careless indifference to life", and that Klein "cannot trust her [Cook's] judgment if released."

I am thrilled to see that Heather Elizabeth Cook will not be seeing the light of day before her trial. Her defense attorney wasn't pleased that his client will be staying in jail, but I'm sure that the family of Thomas Palermo and Maryland drivers are pleased with that at least.

Ms. Cook is most assuredly an addict. She spent six months in an alcohol abuse program after her 2010 arrest. The National Institutes of Health states that there is a high rate of relapse for those suffering from alcoholism. She went into another program after the accident, before her recent arrest. At least she sought treatment the first time.

Now I'm even more angry that Bishop Eugene Taylor Sutton, the head of the Episcopal Diocese of Maryland and Cook's boss, continues to defend not disclosing Ms. Cook's condition to the council that chose Ms. Cook as the suffragan bishop. I know people make mistakes, and I know that her treatment for alcoholism is medical information, which should be handled sensitively. But she was in line for a very high post, one that likely has a higher level of stress and public scrutiny. I think that was not the right call. Aware of the initial arrest, Bishop Sutton could have said to Ms. Cook, "I have some serious concerns about you for this position, and if you're interested, you can apply. But I want you to disclose your arrest and subsequent treatment to the council."

One other not-so-nice scenario comes to mind. I'm no conspiracy theorist, but my Scorpio Machiavellian brain went in this direction. Ms. Cook, as the suffragan bishop, would be working directly for Bishop Sutton. With the understanding that I have no idea how much influence, if any, Bishop Sutton had over the process of selecting Ms. Cook, it would be easy to throw out the "forgiveness" argument so the Bishop could rationalize not mentioning Ms. Cook's addiction. Think about it: If the Bishop wanted Cook working for him, he could have easily made this argument to ensure that his preferred candidate didn't have any black marks on her record for the rest of the voting members to consider. As I've stated earlier, if Cook's addiction had been disclosed and I was voting, I'd pick someone else without an addiction because this person would be under a lot more stress and in a public position in the church. What easier way to make sure that didn't happen than to convince himself, and others around him, that they were acting as the Lord says they should and doing this candidate a major favor at the same time.

I hope they'll consider all four other candidates for the job now; if I had been one, I'd be really pissed off. Why do I think the council picking the next suffragan will give some thought to asking more pointed about other candidates? I certainly hope so.

Bishop Sutton made the wrong call on this one. Did he cause this accident to happen? Of course not. But is it possible that his choice of Heather Cook made her relapse more likely due to the additional pressure of being the #2 bishop, which may have caused this accident. We'll never know the answer to that, and we don't know how long ago Cook's relapse began. It might have happened in any case, but that's not going to give any comfort to Thomas Palermo's widow and children who are looking for answers.

No one who shows a "reckless and careless indifference to life" should be a member of clergy.

What is sadly incredibly ironic is that the video on the Baltimore Sun story shows Ms. Cook presiding over a service where at least 10 carafes of liquid--presumably wine, but that's not confirmed--are sitting on the altar. Well done, Baltimore Sun. Oh well...in vino veritas, right?

Good Clergy, Part 2

Ok, so there's been an update on the story involving Rev. Heather Elizabeth Cook, suffragan of the Episcopal Church in Maryland. She was allegedly involved in the hit and run death of cyclist Thomas Palermo on December 27th in Baltimore. It took quite some time, but the police have charged Cook with vehicular manslaughter, texting while driving, and…wait for it…driving under the influence of alcohol.  

You may recall from my earlier blog on this story that Rev. Cook was arrested in 2010 for driving while intoxicated. At that time, she was given a $300 fine and "probation before judgment". She never served any jail time, nor did she lose her driver's license.  

So we now have reports that confirm much of what was in newspaper accounts earlier, and more information, including:

• Rev. Cook hit Mr. Palermo from behind, causing damage to her passenger side windshield. Her blood alcohol level at the time of the collision was .22, nearly three times Maryland's legal limit. (The Episcopal Church of MD knew that she had been drinking before this incident but police asked them to withhold that information.)
• She left the scene and returned more than 30 minutes later. A cyclist did follow her until she arrived at a gated community. 
• A NFL reporter, Jason La Canfora, called 911 when he found Palermo. He did not see the police administer any sort of breathalyzer to Cook at that time.
• In addition to the charges listed above, Cook faces several others. They're listed at the end of the article linked above.  

All I have to say is, "Are you fucking kidding me?" You didn't think that God was trying to speak to you the first time when you got barely a wrist slap the last time you got caught for a DUI? That wasn't enough of a message?

I'm truly saddened by this revelation, but I shouldn't be surprised. We can't assume that Heather Cook is an alcoholic, nor do we know if she spent any time in treatment for alcohol addiction. It's exceptionally hard to break any addiction, and alcohol is, as I understand it, one of the most challenging to overcome. 

Whether or not she was an addict, she should NOT have been driving. There's no way to know if things would have been different if she had received a stiffer penalty for her first DUI. But I'm of the opinion that she really got away with one there. She was lucky she didn't hurt or kill herself or someone else the last time. 

Yes, members of the clergy are human beings who struggle with things every other human does, like alcoholism or taking responsibility for his or her actions. Yes, she did everything she was required to do last time. And yes, Heather Cook has done a lot of good for a lot of people. But she is not above the law. If she knew she had a problem with alcohol, she should have done the best thing for everyone and not gotten behind the wheel of that 2001 Subaru. But because of her irresponsible actions, she has caused the death of an innocent person. 

Honestly, Ms. Cook is not worthy of any religious title anymore. She was looked upon with respect because of her titles, but in my opinion they should be stripped from her immediately upon conviction. She has no right to call herself a member of the clergy anymore. 

I pray for the family of Thomas Palermo, who is understandably grieving and angry that he was taken from them so senselessly. I send positive thoughts to the people of the Episcopal Church of Maryland, at having lost someone who was by all accounts a good leader. And despite my anger, I pray for Heather Cook, who will have to live with what she's done for her rest of her days, hopefully in prison as a guest of the state of Maryland.

Causing a preventable death due to your own negligence is probably one of worst things I can think of. Karmically, I'm very glad I'm not in Heather Cook's shoes. 

Good clergy starts with good people. While Heather Cook is likely a good person, she's shown through her poor judgment that she's not good enough to be clergy anymore. 

Good Clergy Starts and Ends With Good Human Beings

I was saddened to read this news story in the Washington Post about an Episcopal bishop in Maryland who hit and killed a cyclist in Baltimore last weekend. Part of the title of an associated story really hit home for me: "Who's qualified to be clergy?"

With the understanding that we only have what's been reported in the media so far to go on, here's what we know about the driver of the automobile, Rev. Heather Elizabeth Cook, the 2nd in command or "suffragan" of the Episcopal Church in Maryland. 

• Rev. Cook was arrested in 2010 for DUI while assigned to Maryland's Eastern Shore. According to reports, she was so drunk she couldn't even complete field sobriety tests and had thrown up on herself when pulled over driving a car that was rolling on three wheels and one tire rim. She admitted drinking alcohol and smoking marijuana before getting behind the wheel. Her blood alcohol was .27, three times MD's .08 limit. (I remember learning in school that .25 is the point at which people become unconscious from drinking, so she must have been extremely impaired!) . She received "probation before judgment" and completed her probation. 

• She was placed on the short list for suffragan with four other women. While church leaders were aware of the 2010 incident, the larger group voting to install her as a bishop were unaware of it. Ultimately, she was selected this past spring after undergoing a psychological evaluation and background check. 

• Rev. Cook struck cyclist Thomas Palermo, 41, and left the scene, only to return "20 minutes" later. Unconfirmed reports on cyclist Web sites say that the only reason Cook returned to the scene was because she was being chased by cyclists. Palermo died. 

• Cook was placed on administrative leave, and the Diocese admits that she was involved in the accident, but no charges have been filed at this time. There is no mention of alcohol or drug involvement in this crash. 

This is a tough one. It's very easy to say "They never should have picked her for the job with her DUI," but I'm not sure that's realistic. Should that one mistake ensure that you rise no higher in your profession, despite your excellent qualifications? DUI is nothing to be trifled with. But Rev. Cook admitted her guilt and received punishment, whether you agree that it was too lenient or not. 

I will say, however, that there should have been full disclosure about her previous arrest so people could judge her fairly. Now it looks like the church was hiding something when likely they didn't mean to, but if I had been part of the convention that voted for the suffragan position, I'd ask what prompted church leaders to omit those details. Press reports indicate the leaders determined that "this one mistake shouldn't bar her as leader", but you do a disservice to your flock by not being up front about it.

Every person is different and every case is different. Based on what I've read, if I had been told about her arrest I don't think I'd have voted for her if other candidates were just as qualified. With that said, I don't think that the arrest alone should have prevented her from helping lead her church. We are all humans and have lapses in judgment, and unless there was a greater pattern of alcohol or drug abuse that the church discovered about Rev. Cook and did nothing to remedy, I don't think a reasonable person could have expected this.

What bothered me more than anything in this case was the apparent lack of compassion on the bishop's part. As I've said many times, spiritual leaders should be held to a higher standard, but to me, to just leave someone there dying after you hit them without trying to help is completely unconscionable. That's not even basic human decency, much less what we expect of a spiritual leader. It takes on an even greater significance when this person is not just any leader, but the #2 in the church in Maryland. What does it look like then?

My Scorpio senses are really heightened on this one. Why would you choose to leave a person there when you didn't know how injured they were, and with a heavily damaged windshield, as it said in the report? I'd expect a spiritual leader to stop and do everything they could to help that person, whether they were the one who hit them or not. She should have been on the phone to 911 immediately to get EMS rolling, even if it appeared the cyclist had suffered fatal injuries. (Full disclosure: I don't know that she didn't call 911; that wasn't included in the report, but I'd have thought if she had done something the Post would have included it.)

You know what? That last paragraph was incorrect. The third sentence should have read, "I'd expect any decent human being to stop and do everything they could to help that person." Hell, these days we all have cell phones and we routinely call in traffic accidents and aggressive drivers. Even people who don't normally call in accidents and other road incidents likely would have been moved to see a cyclist on the ground in need of medical treatment to call 911 or get out and see if the person was OK.

I'll be very interested to see what happens. I'll take a moment to repeat that we don't have the whole story on this one, but if it turns out that Rev. Cook hit this cyclist and left the scene without intervening in some way, she should go to jail for vehicular manslaughter and be removed from her position. If evidence comes to light that she was somehow impaired, the book needs to be thrown at her.

My thoughts and prayers go out to Thomas Palermo's family, especially his wife and two young children, as well as to Rev. Cook and the Episcopal Church of MD. This is an ugly situation and only with a strong faith and a desire to heal will they get through it.

As you go out this New Years' Eve, please party responsibly and be aware and safe. You don't want to be the next statistic. And let's be honest...I don't want to lose any readers. :)

Shame on You, Franklin County, Virginia!

I am a resident of this great Commonwealth, but there are very few things that make me more angry than when people in power deny rights to others because of their own biases. 

This is one of a number of articles on this topic, but here is the bottom line: A couple in Franklin County, VA, went to the county courthouse to be married, only to be told by a court-appointed officiant--yes, someone paid by the county to marry people--that he wouldn't marry them because neither of them believe in God. 

You'd think with a plot line like this one, it would have appeared in the Onion, right? WRONG. 

Sadly, this really happened. A county official denied the right of marriage to two people who legally have the right to do so because of the official's religious beliefs. What makes it worse is that the officiant originally agreed to marry them, but only at his church and not in the courthouse. And then he refused to marry them. SUCH BULLSHIT! 

The couple contacted the county clerk, who was stunned, and the clerk asked the couple to contact the judge who appointed said officiant. The judge did not see any problem with the officiant's behavior. Luckily, the county courthouse has a second officiant who has no hangups with agnostics, and the couple will be married in the next few weeks. 

What is scary about this whole incident is the simple fact that the officiant said the couple "did not have the right" to be married because they did not believe in God. The couple recorded the officiant saying it, so while not everything you read on the Internet is true, they've got this on tape. Smart move on the part of the couple, actually. 

Every person has a right to marry if they choose. Here in the Commonwealth of Virginia, homosexuals hopefully will be able to marry soon, but it is not legal yet. That aside, however, if you are unmarried, divorced, or widowed, and you want to marry someone, and obtain a license to marry that person, then the county should have no trouble performing a civil ceremony. 

What does this mean for non-Christians? Well, I would be hesitant working with the Franklin County Courthouse on anything, and I'm very glad I don't live there, because I wouldn't want to face the discrimination that this couple had to deal with. And we're not just talking about Witches or Wiccans, folks, or even Pagans of any kind. There are plenty of non-Christians out there. 

I had the same reaction to this story as I did when I heard that pharmacists can choose to not fill prescriptions for  birth control or the morning-after pill. If that's how you feel, then perhaps this isn't the right career for you. It's easy to say "find another officiant" or "find another pharmacist", but if people don't speak up, then these people will continue to get away with bigotry. 

And what about the judge, who believes this kind of behavior should be tolerated? Would anyone who is not Christian want to go before his court and trust that they would not be discriminated against? We don't have any evidence of bigotry on his part, of course. But could you trust his judgment if he allows discrimination to occur in his jurisdiction? I don't think I would. 

There is a simple solution to this problem: Both the officiant and the judge should be removed. There's no place for bigotry in any government--municipal, county, state, or Federal. 

I hope the citizens of Franklin County send a strong message by not re-electing this particular judge, and by firing this officiant. 

Lessons from Kenny Klein, Prominent Pagan Leader Arrested for Child Pornography

Recently, a Pagan friend contacted me to talk about the "Kenny Klein situation", because it was very upsetting to him. I didn't know who Kenny was until I started doing some Web searching, and I found this article about his recent arrest, which I encourage you to read. 

For the record, Klein has been charged with many counts of possession of child pornography of children under 13. 

Kenny is a well-known Pagan author and musician who has been around for many years. He is also a High Priest in the Blue Star Tradition, and has been teaching "traditional Wicca" for many years as well. He is a Llewellyn author as well. 

My friend wanted to know why people in the Pagan community weren't talking about his arrest online, and once I read the article, I wondered the same thing. So I decided to check it out and write about it myself. 

Speaking personally, child pornography is one of the most disgusting things I can fathom, right along with sexual abuse. But I'm not here to comment on Kenny's guilt or innocence. That's up to the courts. The article mentioned he had already made some kind of admission, but that's not really relevant to what I'm talking about. (Again, in my humble opinion, I will say that if he is found guilty, he should rot in jail and never get out.)

The fact that Kenny is Pagan means nothing to me, except to the extent that it hurts all Pagan communities when someone engages in such behavior. What we have is a spiritual leader who, according to witness accounts, has a history of romantically pursuing young girls who are looking to him for spiritual leadership and guidance. 

There are no words strong enough to describe how incredibly angry, sad, and disappointed I am when I hear about spiritual leaders of any faith taking advantage of the incredible position of trust laid upon them by the people they lead. And it happens in every faith, folks. People's egos get the best of them, and they feel like they can prey on the most vulnerable among us. 

What makes this situation worse is the testimony of one girl who said that Pagan elders dismissed her complaints when she brought them forward, saying that is "how Kenny is." In other words, they are rationalizing his behavior and choosing not to do anything about it. 

Imagine what that must feel like to a victim. You do what they tell you to do: You tell someone in authority about the unsettling behavior of another person. And what do you get for your trouble? NOTHING. Your concerns are dismissed, and the conduct is just accepted. People may even think you are lying to get attention. How would you feel then? Humiliated. Powerless. Enraged. You've just been victimized a second time by those who are supposedly in a position to HELP you. But now they've made it worse by enabling the person's behavior, too. 

I've said it before and I will repeat it: Spiritual leaders of EVERY FAITH should be held to higher standards. We are in positions of trust and we need to earn them every day; one way we do that is by checking our egos at the door. That's a good start. But our conduct must be above reproach at all times. People look up to us and come to us in their darkest hours. We need to be worthy of their trust and confidence. 

Kenny Klein's arrest is a good opportunity for some reminders as you choose spiritual leaders and communities. 

1) Choose any community and/or leader carefully. If a community engages in an activity that you don't like, don't join. If a leader isn't someone who embodies the tenets of the faith you wish to practice, then find someone else. 

2) If you are uncomfortable with the behavior of anyone in that community, leave and don't go back. I know people want to fit in, but it's dangerous to do things you don't want to simply to gain acceptance. 

3) If a spiritual leader makes any kind of romantic and/or sexual advance toward you, get out of the situation as quickly as you can. Then call the police and file a report. Sometimes in Pagan communities or covens, new "initiates" to perform sexual acts to gain admission. Don't allow yourself to be the victim. The same rules apply to Pagan communities as any other: Get out of the situation, then go to the police and file a report. (Spoiler alert: If you're foolish enough to think this doesn't happen, why do you think I'm mentioning it?)

4) Teenagers should have parental permission (in the form of signed waivers) to attend classes offered by any spiritual group. Parents should feel comfortable with the spiritual leaders of communities their teens are involved in, and at the very least should at least go and meet the leaders even if they don't agree with the faith their child is exploring. If a parent has any concerns, s/he should accompany the minor to a community ritual. 

5) Listen to your intuition. If something in a community you visit is wrong, it probably is. At the very least, it's not for you. The same goes for any spiritual leader. If you're not comfortable with them for any reason, or you get a weird feeling from them that is unsettling or makes you fearful, then it isn't the place for you. 

I know you've heard me say this kind of thing before, but unfortunately that message needs repeating. Your spiritual leaders' behavior and conduct should always be above reproach. If it isn't, then that person, no matter what title they hold or what their academic credentials are, doesn't deserve your time and energy. 

K is for Kapaun

Hi everyone! Today's blog is about a man whose incredible spiritual leadership helped many soldiers survive in a very difficult situation. 

Anonymous photo of Fr. Kapaun

(Anonymous/Associated Press)

Try to imagine yourself in this scenario: You're taken prisoner by enemy forces and forced to walk 80 miles to a prison camp at the beginning of winter. You don't have cold-weather gear and when you get to your final destination, you're fed barely enough food to survive. You watch helplessly as your fellow soldiers die around you each day. I think anyone will agree that's a horrific situation.

Now imagine the same scenario, only this time, you're the chaplain of your fellow prisoners. In a life-or-death situation like this one was, it would have been very easy for the chaplain to worry about keeping himself alive and letting the rest fend for themselves.

Fr. Emil Kapaun, a Catholic priest from Kansas, was a chaplain in the Korean War in late 1950 and found himself in this very situation. But instead of trying to keep himself alive, he rose above the conditions and continued to support his troops. He traded his watch for a blanket and cut it into socks for the soldiers. He gave away his food, and stole food to keep his fellow prisoners alive. He could have escaped with the able-bodied soldiers before he was captured, but chose to stay with the wounded. He never returned from the POW camp, but his actions and leadership helped keep many alive.

Yesterday, he was posthumously awarded the Medal of Honor for his heroism. I encourage you to read the entire story from the Washington Post. It's truly amazing. I've also included the link to the book written about him; I plan to buy it myself.

These days it's way too easy to villify spiritual leaders of every faith. With all of the negative things you can find about them to look at on the Internet, I feel like Fr. Kapaun deserves a moment of your precious time. He's the kind of spiritual leader that all of us should expect, and those of us who are spiritual leaders can learn a lot from his example of sacrifice and selfless service. I truly hope the Catholic church decides to make him a saint one day.

Thanks for tuning in! Come back tomorrow for my "L" post!