Letter From Neptune: Enjoying the Holidaze

Dear John...

Another Christmas is here, and already people around the world are riding with me! It's pretty cool but also a little bit scary.

Alcohol consumption and therapy are both in my purview, and it's facsinating to me that many people spend the holidays self-medicating both ways. It's not a problem on both counts when neither are taken to an extreme, though. What I find really interesting is that people end up spending the holiday with most of the people who were involved in causing the difficulties in the first place. Why that is I have no idea. Maybe people are trying to deal with their problems head-on, and that's more of a Mars way of handling the situation. I'm more of an "avoid the problems" type; it always seems to work for me.

Anyway, enjoy your Mike's Hard Lemonade and have a fantastic day! Hope it won't be the subject of any therapy sessions later. 

Believe,

Neptune

Update: Venus Retrograde...going on now!

[I deleted my last Venus retrograde post by accident, folks, and people were looking for it. So I made a few tweaks and re-posted. Most of the updates are at the bottom. Thanks for tuning in!]

You know the drill by now, folks. But just in case, here's a reminder of just how vital Venus is. 

OK, so let's start off with some background. Venus is a planet that is extremely important astrologically, although many of us don't really pay much attention to it unless it's Valentine's Day. Here are some of the things Venus rules:

• Love and attraction
• Beauty in form
• Refinement of artistic tastes
• Our romantic, poetic, and artistic selves

Taurus and Libra folks, this is your ruling planet, the lovely and charming Venus. Some of you may also know her as the Greek goddess Aphrodite. 

Most people think about love and attraction only when it comes to romance. I'm here to tell you that Venus also has a financial role. Why? Because if we are in business for ourselves, for example--like yours truly--our ability to make money and succeed depends on our ability to attract and retain clients. So Venus has an often overlooked role in our financial success. Also, if you're looking for work, Venus is an important planet for you to attract the attention of the right employer. Problems with Venus in your birth chart and indicate both love and money difficulties.

So I hope I've been able to convince you that this lady is nothing to be trifled with. Venus goes into retrograde once every eighteen months, and before you open your mouth to complain, it's the LEAST amount of retrograde time of any of the planets in the solar system. You gotta cut the girl some slack; she's busy and needs a break! 

Anyway, when this planet starts to move "backward" in the sky, the focused is on unfinished business in our emotional and financial relationships. Here are some things to know about what you might experience, in both love and money.

Love and social affairs--Overall, relationships tend to slow down. This is not a good time to:

• Get married
• Go on first dates
• Have big parties
• Change your hairstyle
• Wear flamboyant clothing
• Buy a new wardrobe
• Re-decorate your home or business

Business--You may experience:

• Legal issues
• Problems with diplomacy or negotiations

Also, this is NOT a good time to begin new business partnerships. So if you can avoid doing this until it's over, all the better. 

Relationships that are already having difficulty may feel additional pressure. Venus retrograde often forces us to face feelings that we have ignored in the past, and re-evaluate those friendships and romantic partnerships as these emotions re-surface.

I wanted to make one thing clear as well: This is a time to acknowledge these feelings, but it's not a time to act on them. Wait until the retrograde period is over to do so.

Statistically speaking, January is when the most marriages and divorces occur, and with Venus in retrograde in Capricorn, a stable, long-term sign, a lot of marriages may be breaking up this holiday season. Evaluate your feelings carefully now. 

Good luck! If you have any stories that I can share, please let me know!

Keeping Saturn in Saturnalia

Dear John,

First of all, welcome to my time of year! I know how excited you must be that my influence is at its peak now. I know I am! I provide the season with a sense of dignity and peace. 

With the understanding that you are on vacation and with sincere apologies for the interruption, I am writing to complain about a story I heard involving me. An athiest group decided to put up a banner that said "Keep Saturn in Saturnalia!" in response to a New Jersey town's "Keep Christ in Christmas!" banner. And then some idiot decided to try to burn down the sign that was dedicated to me! 

If I was Neptune I would probably say "WHAT THE HELL...?" But since I'm not him...or her...I'll just say I am saddened that some group who believes in no higher power anyway decided to throw me into this fight without even warning me first. That was undignified to say the least, and downright impolite. There was no need for that.

There are so many things wrong with this picture. I thought that people on earth were supposed to be nicer at this time of year. I guess not. 

Do you know how many years it has been since people celebrated Saturnalia? A heck of a long time. It was pretty good when it went on...I think it was nice. But you know, times change and the world moves on. They don't need to bring it back.

I don't want to be a pawn in some stupid fight over a banner...well, technically about two banners. Can't everyone just...what's the phrase you prefer? "Get over themselves"? 

People are powerful. They have choices and control. Why let a banner upset you? If you don't like what the town is doing, then don't go down there or spend your money there. If you are that offended, move out. (Did anyone tell them that many pagans worship me? Are you really sure an athiest group should be invoking a Roman god? Kind of odd, wouldn't you agree?)

By the same token, the Saturnalia banner should get the same respect as the other one. No one has tried to burn that one down, right? At least not yet. But some misguided soul couldn't stand their beliefs being mocked by an old Roman holiday? Really? All it takes is a joke for your faith to feel threatened? Sounds like someone needs to examine their own beliefs a little harder. The same rules apply for these people. If you don't like it, don't look. And put down the accelerant and matches before you hurt yourself! 

Of course, I didn't take it personally. It would have been the same as if someone who knew Neptune rules music to say "Keep the 'tune' in Neptune!", or even "Keep the 'us' in Venus!" to push the value of relationships. Am I sounding stupid now? Yup. And that is the point. 

Anyway, I am so sorry for interrupting your vacation. Enjoy my season...and if you are feeling frisky, a dance for Saturnalia would make me happy. 

Very truly yours,

Saturn 

A Look Back At the November That Was...

I promised you updates a while back and let it not be said that I'm a liar…at least about this. We have plenty to talk about, so we'd better get started.

I hope all of you had a fantastic Thanksgiving and that none of you were arrested in a fight at a big box store trying to buy presents. It seems like it defeats the spirit of the holidays…but hey, what do I know?

First of all, my absence can be easily explained. No, it wasn't because of my new computer…but we'll get back to that, I assure you. I was doing National Novel Writing Month in November. For those of you who don't know what that is, NaNoWriMo is a program through which you pledge to write 50,000 words on a brand new novel in a month. I successfully made my quota, which breaks down to 1666 words a day, and can declare myself a winner. My beloved also won. 

Congratulations to everyone who finished! It's a challenge but it's worth it. The point is to get you writing; you can't edit anything you've written, so you're just supposed to sit down and write without judging. Sure, some of it's going to be shit, but some will be great. 

I decided to try this a few years back to fight against my Saturn vs. Neptune opposition, and let me tell you that it really works. When no one is seeing it and you can just write without judgment, you can just let it flow. I encourage everyone to give it a try. 

OK, so that explains my absence. Now on to other matters. Mercury retrograde wasn't pleasant this time around for me, but it wasn't truly horrific. A number of my friends were not as lucky; one Gemini guy I know who didn't know about astrology decided he believes in it now. There was just too much Mercury fuckery for him. I hope you made it through OK. You've got another few months before we do it again; that's right, we're back at it on January 21. I know you can't wait…admit it. 

After getting the gift card via email and not regular mail from Apple, I ordered the new computer. It came in on November 12 and I took the chance of doing an installation of new software during the storm as it was getting back up to full speed. I was fortunate and everything is perfect. I'm typing on it now and IT IS AWESOME. I will never go back to a PC. 

I spent several hours today playing games that kept crashing on my old machine due to the graphics problems. One of my favorites, Civilization, had a new expansion pack and with my totally tricked out machine it handled the game easily. I even increased the graphics quite a bit and it's gorgeous. 

Civilization is a game that has been around since 1990 and Jen and I learned to play it going to college together. This version is AMAZING and is light years ahead of where it was, but it's still addictive. You start with a settler unit and build a city, and through it you build an entire empire. Is it as complex as it sounds? Absolutely. But for a guy like me, it's perfect. 

I spent this afternoon learning the new wrinkles. I played as King Kamehaha and the Polynesians, which was a new civilization for me to try out, and managed to play into the 1700s before I decided I wasn't winning. I tried too late to bring religion into my civilization, and while I did found Judaism, the Egyptians converted all my cities to Islam before I even tried it, so it was pretty much a lost cause. D'OH!

You can pick which religion you'd like to find. While Wicca was not among them, you'll be happy to know that there were 20 religions to pick from, many more than the five in the last version. 

NOTE TO SELF: If you're going to found a new religion, do it early in the game and use it to your advantage. 

And before I start getting hate mail asking about Pele, my little girl is fine. She's been out of her cone for about two weeks, and the spay operation went just fine. The scar is even gone now. The world doesn't need more kittens, but she'd have made some beautiful ones. Just sayin'. She's even faster than before and purrs like crazy pretty much constantly. I'm so lucky to have her. Jen did a great job with her; she got up at night to take care of Pele and let me sleep. That woman is amazing, let me tell you. :)

Anyway, I promise to blog more again soon with more information. Things just keep happening, folks, and we've got another Venus retrograde coming on Yule. Stay tuned for that one; nothing like Venus fuckery over the holidaze! 

Important Updates: Pele and Mercury Fuckery

OK, so to begin with, a special thanks to all of you who have sent Reiki, prayers, positive energy, and email or Facebook messages for Pele's speedy recovery. The first day home was pretty rough; it was obvious she was in pain and we hated having to wait for several hours to give her pain meds. But she has bounced back like the champion she is, and is now doing--or trying to do--everything she normally does. She would like me to remove that collar, but unfortunately she will keep in on at least for the foreseeable future.

I'd also like to give a huge shout-out to my beloved bride, Jen, who is checking on Pele many times during the night. Pele is closed in with us so she won't get into as much trouble, and has on several occasions tried to remove the collar. Jen is literally losing sleep making sure my kitten is safe, healthy, and happy as I sleep soundly.

I was hoping to do something special for Jen, but what happened next was not what I had in mind. I accidentally knocked a large book and her Kindle off the counter onto the floor. Said large book fell onto the Kindle, so it smashed the screen into the floor. While the screen was intact, attempts at resuscitation failed. That's gratitude for you…she loses sleep to take care of your cat and you kill off her Kindle. So we ordered her a new Kindle Fire. Add that to the Mercury Retrograde pile.

Overall, this Merc retro has not been too bad. I've had a few get cancelled at the last minute, but overall things have been very calm. [CROSSES FINGERS].

On the computer front, my old iMac arrived at its destination on my birthday as expected, and it took another week for them to tell me that they had "completed the audit". How much am I getting for it? No idea. When will I get a gift card? Still don't know. I check it about once every five minutes to see if any additional information has been posted. So no computer has been ordered, of course.

The best news? Even if I ordered it tomorrow, my new iMac wouldn't get here before the end of Mercury retrograde, so at least I can avoid the fuckery of trying to install new software and getting it up to speed. Hopefully we'll be back in business long before Thanksgiving; I've got at least 3 astrological charts I've got to do with November due dates and I'd rather not miss them all.