Mars Retrograde: Going Soft

[knocking]

Mars: Shit! I gotta go, gotta get the job done!

[opens door]

Venus: Hi Mars! How are you doing?

Mars: [pause] OK, I guess. What brings you out here?

Venus: [smiles] You, silly. Can I come in?

Mars: Well, my place is a mess...

[Venus walks in past Mars]

Venus: No more so than usual!

Mars: I'm sort of in the middle of packing, Venus, so I'm not going to be very good company. 

Venus: That's OK. I came over to keep YOU company. I haven't seen you in weeks!

Mars: Yeah, well, things have been a little nuts. I'm just off right now and I don't feel like doin' shit.

Venus: I understand. It's that time again. 

Mars: Yeah. Fuckin' sucks. 

Venus: Are you going anyplace exciting?

Mars: Probably going to head to Russia and see a few of the World Cup games.

Venus: That will be fun! 

Mars: Yeah, I guess. Lot of fuckin' angry people right now. And I've got nothing for them until I get back. People have to fuckin' chill. The whole summer's fuckin' shot to hell!

Venus:  I'm glad you're taking a break. Clearly, you're off. 

Mars: And we both know how good I am dealing with my fuckin' emotions! Why did you come over here, anyway?

Venus: Because I care about you. I know your retrograde gets you down.

Mars: I'm ashamed to even say this but I'm not even in the mood. It's been hard for me to even get...well, hard. You know?

Venus: [concerned] All men go through that sometimes. It will pass. [smiles] Don't you usually bring your "special collection" with you on business trips? That should help!

Mars: Yeah, but I'm just not feeling as horny as usual. And the last time I almost carried the special collection on the plane by accident! I do not want someone x-raying that shit. It will end up on YouTube!

Venus: Honey, I'm sure they see sex toys and porn all the time. Nothing illegal about that.

Mars: I'm just not fucking READY to go right now! I wish I could put this trip off. 

Venus: Part of the job, honey. Here, why don't you put your suitcase down for a minute?

Mars: I don't have time! I need to be out early for the flight tomorrow. 

[Venus walks up to Mars and gets in his way]

Venus: Mars! Put. The. Suitcase. Down. [Pause] Please. 

[Mars drops suitcase with a crash]

Mars: Shit. That wasn't good. 

[Venus wraps her arms around him]

Venus: I'm going to miss you, Mars. 

Mars: Goddammit, Venus. [starts to sob]

Venus: It's OK. Just let it out. [Pause] And you didn't forget to pack the lube in plastic bags this time, right?

Mars: [collecting himself] I still need to do that. 

Venus: [detaching herself from him] I'll do it. We'll finish your packing together.   

Mars: Thanks. I can't wait to get back from this trip. Hopefully, people won't be too pissed at me.

Venus: When are you back?

Mars: August 27. Too fucking long. 

Venus: Well, let's get finished so you can get some rest. 

Tara's New Moon in Gemini Forecast!

June 13, 2018

3:43pm

Washington, DC

Hello Sky Watchers!

Welcome back for another discussion on our bi-monthly lunations. As we have discussed in past posts, the New Moon is a lunar rebirth and symbolizes new beginnings.

At the time that the moon perfects (completes) its conjunction (union) with the Sun, Libra will be moving across the eastern horizon. With Libra rising, Venus rules the chart, giving a measure of beauty or smoothness to the outer appearance. However, there is far more beneath the surface to this New Moon.

Chart ruler Venus will be conjunct the MC (Midheaven), so your outer life could seem fantastic. You could be finally doing what you love and have found your calling within your career. However, with Venus at the last degree of Cancer, also known as a critical or anaretic degree, this indicates the comfort we feel may not last very long. Critical degrees are between 29 and zero degrees, when a planet is about to enter into a new sign. The new sign changes the expression of energy and alters how the planet was expressing itself.

Venus in Cancer is nurturing and emotional. If you’ve noticed a shakeup in your relationships these last few days, there is a good reason why: Venus squares Uranus, the planet of revolution. Uranus just moved into Taurus after spending 7 years in Aries. Taurus represents the things we find comfort in, and the traditions we have grown accustomed to. At the time of the New Moon, the relationship between Venus and Uranus suggests the need for adjustment between energies.

Also, Uranus will be in the 7th house of relationships and Venus will be in the 10th house of career. We need to balance what we desire with our outer lives and the changes we are facing with our interpersonal relationships with others. The presence of Uranus here suggests that some of these changes could be both surprising and upsetting.

Mercury rules the sign Gemini, and Gemini is the sign the New Moon lunation occurs in. Mercury is in the 9th house of the higher mind and abstract thinking, but in the sign of Cancer. Cancer makes Mercury very thoughtful, reflective, and emotional. Mercury is sextile Uranus and semi-sextile Venus at the time of the New Moon. Sextiles and semi-sextiles denote the planets are working together. With emotional Mercury in the house of higher thought working with the planet of love and revolution in the 10th and 7th houses; we can be sure that there will be aspects to the changes which will make an emotional impact on us to which we will most likely have an emotionally charged response.

Mercury is also inconjunct Mars in Aquarius in the 4th house of home and family. Mars is Aquarius screams independence, freedom and even rebellion. An inconjunction requires adjustments to avoid unfavorable outcomes. With emotional Mercury clashing with Mars, changes made in our environment or our interpersonal relationships could be met with an emotional response. Be prepared for the people in your lives to disagree with the direction you’re due to their own desires and needs.

The 8th house is the heaviest house in the chart and the Sun and Moon reside there. The 8th house’s focus is on what we need to let go, the merger of energy for a common goal, transformation, death and rebirth. Although the Sun and moon have no relationship to Mercury in this chart, they are still ruled by it because they are in Gemini. With Mercury in Cancer, the way we communicate could be much more emotional than usual, watering down normal Gemini banter with the potential for sarcasm or moodiness. Choose your words carefully.

See you next time, Sky Watchers!

Blessings,

Tara

"Zodiac Girl" Lori G Discusses the Moon in Pisces!

Hello everyone! I'd like to take a moment to introduce Lori G! This is her first blog and I asked her to discuss her very sensitive Moon position in Pisces. Welcome Lori and take it away!

Hello to all you astro-lovers!

My name is Lauren, but my friends call me Lori. John thought it would be a great idea if I could contribute my thoughts and experiences with a particular placement in my chart; so today, we are going to talk about my Moon in Pisces.
which resides in the 12th house, the natural home of the Fish. I hope I can shed some light on this particular kind of energy and create a depth of understanding to those who have this placement or know someone who does.

So, what qualities can we ascribe to Moon in Pisces? Well, they are one of the more compassionate Moon placements; Pisceans have a strong urge to connect, understand, and serve humanity or at least those within their day-to-day interactions. 

Pisces Moon is incredibly receptive, able to absorb energy and vibrations from those around them. More often than not, Pisces Moon natives have some psychic ability and strong intuition. This can be a great gift, but it also comes with a bit of a burden. Lunar Fish can become easily drained and can have a strong desire, or rather a need, for seclusion and isolation in order to regain their energy and strength.

When a Pisces Moon is evolved--"tuned in, tapped in, and turned on"--they can be expressive and open. They have a quirky sense of humor and you can find them within the heart of a group, often generating a happy, peaceful vibration. They use their imagination for personal and creative purposes. 

Since Pisces rules the 12th house, those with this Moon placement most effectively connect within the dream-state. Appropriately enough, their assigned modern ruler is Neptune, the planet of dreams, illusions, and the astral world.

When unevolved, Pisces moon finds it extremely difficult to nurture and protect themselves. Often, being so sensitive to energies can denote a focus on the external world and create discord with this impressionable moon. If not consciously aware of this, the Lunar Fish may gravitate toward methods of nurturing or shielding themselves in unhealthy ways. These can include drug abuse, excessive alcohol consumption, emotional eating, and more.

So, now to the important part: What is my own experience with Moon in Pisces? Well, quite frankly, it’s shit but it is also fulfilling. Much like the symbol of Pisces being two Fish, there are days that are better than others. There are days when I’m at the surface of the murky waters. I am present, I am aligned with the divine, and  I am a source of comfort for others. Then there are days where I disappear into the dark abyss of the deepest waters. I am fearful, I am harmful to myself with my thoughts and actions, and I am cold.

So my lunar life is a balancing act. I feel fortunate that I have an understanding of my Moon sign for I am learning to accept that I will have days where all I want to do is get lost in a good book or just cry just to feel the release. As I grow more into my Sagittarius Sun, I still carry my Pisces Moon with me: A girl with a heart much too big for her body, a voracious dreamer, a lover of people, and with a thirst for life.

Until next time!

Lori | The Zodiac Girl

Joining the Family at Sticks and Stones in Fairfax, VA!

Jupiter: Little dude! What are you doing here? I'm supposed to be doing the shameless marketing around here!

Pluto: Cut out that "little" shit, you expanding windbag! We're talking about a wholesale fucking CHANGE here, so of course, I'm going to show up. Got a problem with that?

Jupiter: [nervously] No, Pluto. Of course not!

Pluto: Didn't think so. Get on with it.

Jupiter: [smiling] Right. Anyway, as John's favorite shill, I'm here to tell you that you'll have more opportunities to see John in person! He'll be joining the Sticks and Stones family in Fairfax, VA, as a tarot reader on Tuesday evenings!

Pluto: And he's still reading in Occoquan, right?

Jupiter: Of course! This is an expansion! Those dates are still on his calendar. Why do less when you can do MORE?

Pluto: Damn right! And you assholes reading these better remember he's one of mine! This will be a perfect spot in John's quest for TOTALLLLLLLL WORLD DOMINATIONNNNNNNNNNNNN!

Jupiter: Ummmm, not really. Have you met John? And why do you sound like that guy who always says "Let's get ready to rumble!" at the beginning of the fake wrestling matches?

Pluto: Because this is serious shit. We're not playing around today, Mr. Exaggeration.

Jupiter: Well, you know you kind of interrupted the flow I was going for...

Pluto: Look, don't give me any flack, Big Picture. I'm here, I did my part, and now I'm going to fuck right off. But to say thanks for including me, I've asked Mercury to help me make some travel reservations for you for your next retrograde. [hands a packet to Jupiter]

Jupiter: An adventure! Wicked cool! Where am I going?

Pluto: New Mexico! It's the only place in the continental United States that has a geologic nuclear waste facility, and I figured you might want to see it! I've been five times. I just can't get enough. 

Jupiter: [looking down at papers] Ummmm, thanks? 

Pluto: Don't mention it. I put it on Saturn's credit card.

Jupiter: Wait, what?

Pluto: Bon voyage!

Tara's Sagittarius Full Moon Forecast!

Full Moon
May 29, 2018
10:19 AM, Manassas, VA

Greetings, Sky Watchers! Welcome back for another post from Astrology by Tara.

At the time of the full moon chart, Leo is the sign on the Ascendant here in the Nation’s capital, which gives the Sun rulership.

One of the first things to notice is that the Ascendant and the North Node are conjunct. The nodes are not fixed points like planets, but are more like path markers in our present lifetime towards a journey of self-evolution (North Node), which is often tied to our karmic past (south node). The Ascendant is how we present ourselves to the world, our wrapping, and the vibe we give people.

Stop and think about this for a moment: Who we are and the 

nodes--the gates of destiny--are meeting up for a few minutes on the day of the full moon! There is a lot of power surging and we would wise to take hold of what we can for a positive change.

Since the nodes are always directly opposed to one another, the North Node conjunct the Ascendant means the South Node is next to the descendant. With the North Node and the Ascendant opening up a gateway in the first house of self, the Moon’s focus is on the self and our health. Naturally ruled by Aries / Mars, it marches in to every situation with gusto. This is a strong relationship with the angles of the 1st and 7th houses, pitting “I” against “we” as well as “me” against anyone else. It’s a reminder that there is no “I” in “team”, but you’ll have to balance what you can accomplish on your own and what you can’t.

In Washington, DC, the 5th and 11th houses are in play, and the 5th house represents play and other forms of pleasure that we enjoy on a personal level. The 11th house represents fun in groups as well as group dynamics and teams. Gemini sun and Sagittarius moon bring out the masculine dynamic yet again. Also, the degrees of the lunation (8 degrees and 10 minutes) are mutually sextile to the nodal axis and the 1st / 7th house cusps, transferring energy among them.

The most active house in the chart the 6th house of health, job, and daily routine. All three malefics—Mars, Saturn, and Pluto—are together in Saturn-ruled signs of Capricorn and Aquarius. Saturn makes us earn what we achieve, and with Saturn in the house of our health and daily tasks, we would be wise to slow down enough to pay attention to the small details. If we don’t, we might get a little more than we bargained for. The silver lining: Saturn and Pluto in Capricorn in the 6th could lead to a breakthrough and something better.

One of the saving graces of this full moon is the grand trine in water. We have Venus in Cancer, Neptune in Pisces, and Jupiter in Scorpio. Venus and Neptune are in our psychic houses, the 8th and 12th. Water in and of itself is a conductor of our emotions and it represents the eternal womb of the God consciousness. Water naturally occupies the 4th, 8th and 12th houses in the natural zodiac so this can indicate some deep soul searching, psychic inclinations, or emotional blessings and rewards.

The wildcard for the next few weeks is the entry of Uranus into Taurus. Uranus is a very slow moving planet and he finally crossed the threshold of another sign, leaving Aries and entering Taurus. This situation creates a whole new dynamic, and change is on the forefront. Right about now, everyone should be having an “Aha!” moment. Opportunity is knocking, but are you prepared?

See you next time, Sky Watchers!

Blessings,

Tara