Astrology has become more mainstream than ever before, thanks to the Internet and a whole bunch of enthusiastic millenials. Overall, I think this is a good thing; I was honestly worried ten years ago that astrology might die out. Glad I was anxious for no reason. Thanks millenials!
One of the side effects of this enthusiasm is that people of all ages and walks of life are learning more and more about astrology. And Mercury and his frequent retrogrades as well as their potential side effects have clearly captured the attention of a much larger audience than ever before. This raises the topic more often in public discourse, but not always in a positive way.
Mercury retrograde has become the frequent target of blame for many people whose lives are not going exactly the way they want them to. It also is a common theme when trying to justify things people said that they might not have meant, or things they actually did mean but said in a way that was not as positive as they would have preferred.
Nowadays, every four months people start the OMFG MERCURY IS GOING RETROGRADE! dance. And I will agree that there are some potential problems that can occur during Mercury's retrograde--usually three or four times a year for three weeks, if you're asking. But freaking out is not the best way to make use of your time.
So here are a few ways to avoid the Mercury retrograde hysteria!
1) Beware of the self-fulfilling prophecy. I hear people say "This Merc retrograde is going to SUCK!" What do you think happens when you say that? When something does happen to you, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy and you blame Mercury. Don't assume that it will be good or bad during a retrograde period; we all have different experiences.
2) Observe what happens, then consider its possible relationship to Mercury without assuming there is one. I'd be the first to tell you that Mercury is an important astrological planet. But he isn't responsible for everything up there, folks, and you know it.
3) "The stars may impel, but they cannot compel." This wonderful quote is from St. Augustine, believe it or not. This Scorpio saint reinforced the idea that we as human beings are responsible for our own actions and our reactions to what happens to us, not the stars. Can we choose different times so that the stars can help us succeed in our efforts? Absolutely. But when something does go wrong, it's not the planet's fault. Sometimes shit just happens.
In summary, people have been dealing with Mercury retrograde periods for thousands of years. There's no need to get spun up about it. Don't give over your responsibility for decision-making to any planet!
If you're curious about how a given retrograde might affect you, consult your astrologer and they can give you more insight. But for the time being, be cautious when dealing with Mercury-ruled areas of your life; speak slowly and clearly and wait to make sure your messages are received; and be a little more patient with others without assuming ill intent.
You could feel the effects through August 20. Enjoy the retrograde and don't hesitate to send me your observations!
Saturn: Greetings and a sincere Happy Independence Day to all Americans. As you can see it's been a while since I've been allowed my rightful place as the undisputed most popular planet on this blog.
Mars: Come on, Old man! What the fuck are we doing today? Aren't we supposed to be off? Happy 4th to us as we schlep off to the salt mines! This is some bullshit!
Saturn: We are here by divine obligation, my boy, so let's try to make the most of it, shall we? I'm taking a break from my retrograde to be here today.
Pluto: This is bullshit. I'm retrograde too but no one seems to give a shit!
Mars: That's because you're not around at all, man. I mean, if you'd stay in the office for a while you'd actually get some shit done.
Pluto: I can get more done in an hour than you can in a week, Testosterone Boy.
Mars: No way, asshole! NO WAY!
Saturn: (scoffs) Well, gentlemen--although I should use that term loosely as it pertains to you both--we're here today to discuss the current astrological situation; namely, the retrograde picture and eclipses.
Mars: Dude, people think it's like total bedlam these days! Soft is what they are! ROLL WITH IT! No need for the drama, amirite?
Pluto: Humans don't like change. When will you figure this out, jock strap?
Mars: Fuck and you, shrimpie! I'll take you any fucking day!
Saturn: [sighs] Will you two please pipe down? Mars, I will tell Venus if you misbehave and you won't be able to enjoy your usual carnal entertainments.
Mars: What carnival, Saturn? What are you talking about?
Pluto: Forget it, dumbass. He means you won't get any if you keeping shooting off your asshole mouth.
Mars: Why didn't you just say that? Well let's get this shit over with. Five planets will be retrograde next week, but honestly, the only one you gotta worry about is Mercury. We can barely keep track of his ass when he's direct, but he'll go retrograde on July 7 at 4 Leo.
Pluto: Who fucking cares, though? These Mercury changes are temporary so I don't see why people get all upset. I mean, really. Just fucking pay attention, people. That's it.
Mars: For once I agree with you, shrimpie! Here's how to deal with Merc retro. 1) Don't say stupid shit! 2) Don't do stupid shit! 3) Don't sign a damn thing! 4) Don't say shit you don't mean. There you go! Easy. Oh yeah...and do all this until August 20.
Saturn: As usual, Mars, your ability to think critically is a model for intellectuals everywhere.
Mars: Dude, how many times do I have to tell you that I don't fucking GET you half the time?
Saturn: Let me try again. [thinks hard and assumes vapid expression] Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude TRUE STORY AMIRITE!?!?
Mars: WHOA! Hey, maybe you can teach a very old dog new tricks!
[Saturn glowers at Mars]
Pluto: Shouldn't the boss and Luna be here to talk about the eclipses?
Saturn: It was our turn this time, Pluto. We were ordered to come, and you know how I feel about orders.
Pluto: Eclipses can be a total bitch. Just hang on for the ride. I'm a big fan because they can close doors permanently and open others for the first time. You don't have to fucking like it, but that's how it is. And if you think this is fun, just watch how things form up as 2022 approaches!
Saturn: I think we can end our remarks there, Pluto!
Pluto: The people need to know, you ancient fuck! The United States was founded almost 250 years ago, and it has its first of my returns in 2022, Old Man. The revolution you see happening is another form of the cycles that led up to their first revolution. That's pretty important!
Saturn: Pluto, that was my nice way of saying "Shut up because we're done here!"
Pluto: Old Man, did you say something? Because I wasn't listening!
Mars: We've been here too long already, little dude! Just shut up! I'm gonna bounce!
Pluto: Fine. Fuck you both. Happy birthday, America. Hope you appreciate me more than these fucks.
