Thursday, July 29, 2021

Interview with Jupiter, Part 3


John: Life is a great teacher. And you are too, apparently.

Jupiter: I am. And don’t think I haven’t done my research on you, good sir.

John: I’m pretty much an open book, so what are you referring to?

Jupiter: I am seriously strong in your chart, sir. Jupiter in Sagittarius, baby! That’s one of the reasons you’re such a fantastic teacher.

John: I would agree. But this interview isn’t about me. For now, let’s focus on the idea that when it comes to both learning and teaching, you play a large role.

Jupiter: For certain! But I’m different from Mercury, who has a piece of the puzzle, if you will, in the learning and teaching realm.

John: Now we’re getting somewhere. Tell me how you’re different.

Jupiter: Well, he gets caught up in the details! For him, they are the most important thing. Accuracy, figures, correctness, and facts. When you learn that the capital of Missouri is…[thinks] Shit! What is it? Do you happen to know?

John: Jefferson City, as I recall.

Jupiter: Good for you! It’s one of those cities in Missouri; there’s millions of ‘em! Anyway, the point is that I don’t care really about that sort of thing. I’m looking more for “How to people in the Midwest view life as a whole? What’s important to them? What are their values?”

John: In other words, you take more of a global life view, rather than a specific one?

Jupiter: That’s a great way of putting it. I want to know what’s behind what people believe. What principles guide them? How did they come to learn them? That sort of thing.

John: It almost sounds like you’re talking about morality.

Jupiter: That is a part of what I do for sure. And for many people, their idea of morality comes from their spiritual beliefs. My purview includes religion, spirituality, or whatever you want to call it.

John: And in a more secular situation we could call that philosophy, right?

Jupiter: Some people would for sure. So you can take the religious angle, or you can go the secular route. Different worldviews are good! That’s how we learn. Nothing wrong with agnostics or athiests!

John: Speaking of worldviews, let’s talk about foreign lands. I know when I lived in France, I had a completely different view of the world than I do here in the United States.

Jupiter: Absolutely! When you go someplace different, the culture—attitudes, ideas, values, and all that—affects you. And it’s the fact that it is not what you’re used to that makes it amazing. People grow overseas. I bet you did.

John: Oh yeah. I went over there thinking “I’m not going to change like everyone says I will.”

Jupiter: [laughter] And how did that work out for you?

John: [smile] You know how it worked out. It’s a different culture. People there live differently. I saw things that I never expected. I came back a very different person, but a better one.

Jupiter: Yes, they do have a different way of life. They value more of their family time than they do here. They’re not so work-focused. They take their vacations seriously. All those cultural points of difference…that’s all me. Until it becomes normal. How long did it take for you to get used to hearing French all around you?

John: About three days. Then I settled in so well that when I went back home, hearing English was stressful for a few hours before I re-acclimated.

Jupiter: Culture shock is a thing! So now when you go to France or deal with French-speaking people, you know what to expect?

John: Yes.

Jupiter: That’s where my influence ends. Once the shock wears off, once you know what to expect, it’s no longer “foreign” and the other planet takes over.

Thursday, July 22, 2021

Interview with Jupiter, Part 2

John: If we return the idea of truth for a moment, Jupiter, your reputation also precedes you. 

Jupiter: I am fascinated. Do tell! 

John: My understanding is that as the planet of expansion, you tend to, well, expand things… 

Jupiter: You catch on quickly! I don’t see a point here yet, though… 

John: If I could finish the statement, please. 

Jupiter: As you said, it’s your world. 

John: Consequently, there is a distinct tendency for you to expand the truth. How do you respond to that? 

Jupiter: You’re saying that I exaggerate, that I somehow make things bigger than they should be, that I intentionally increase… 

John: I’m going to start calling you Monsieur Roget if you’re not careful. 

Jupiter: Who’s that? 

John: The guy who wrote a famous thesaurus. 

Jupiter: I love those! There can always be more ways of expressing the most glorious…[looks at John] You crossed your arms again. That can’t be good. 

John: To borrow a phrase, ‘you catch on quickly’. [pause] Would you care to answer my question? 

Jupiter: Of course! 

John: “Of course”? Is that the answer to my question or a signal that you will eventually answer it? 

Jupiter: You do NOT give up! But yes, I will absolutely answer it. 

John: Excellent. That’s what we’re all waiting for. 

Jupiter: Then you shall have it. The short answer is yes, I do have a tendency to exaggerate things. 

John: Everything or just some things? 

Jupiter: Everything. If you’re going to exaggerate, you gotta do it big. 

John: That could almost be your motto! 

Jupiter: What? “Gotta do it big!”? 

John: That’s what I’m thinking. 

Jupiter: Can’t deny it! Sounds good to me! 

John: I realize this is kind of a leading question, but here goes: Don’t you see any potential problems with making everything bigger? 

Jupiter: It’s what I do. It’s up to guys like you to figure out potential problems. But generally speaking, as I was saying earlier, people like having me around. 

John: Well, I would posit that they like the IDEA of you about half as much as the actual you. 

Jupiter: [mock frown] Wow, you went all Andy Rooney on me there. Kind of a downer, aren’t you? That’s why Saturn likes you so much! That old bastard brags on you all the time. 

John: In Jupiter-speak, that means he made a moderately favorable statement about me at one time. Correct? 

Jupiter: [hands up] You got me! [smirks] Yeah…I don’t really pay attention to amounts or numbers. I mean, it’s the overall view of life, that’s what counts. 

John: Just making sure. I’d like my readers to make sure they have an accurate picture of who you are. 

Jupiter: Well, I mean, to be fair, accuracy has its place, but I need to be free to take some poetic license! The idea that words mean exactly what they’re supposed to is so…Mercury’s department. 

John: Of course. [writes on iPad] So let’s see. Desperate need for freedom: check. Exaggeration of the truth: Check. 

Jupiter: Now wait a second! What is truth? How can you say I exaggerate if we don’t talk about what that IS? 

John: As you may recall, I was attempting to get to that topic a little earlier. 

Jupiter: [thinks for a moment] Ah yes! Of course you were! The truth is really about how I see the world, and that can change. 

John: So what you’re saying is that your “truth” evolves, based on the overall principles and situations I find myself in at a given point in my life? 

Jupiter: Will you look at that! That’s EXACTLY what I’d have said.

Thursday, July 15, 2021

Interview with Jupiter, Part 1


John: Ladies and gentlemen, it’s my pleasure to… 

Jupiter: [game show announcer voice] NOW INTRODUCING THE ASTROLOGICAL PLANET THAT REQUIRES NO INTRODUCTION! THE ONE AND ONLY JUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPITERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! WHOOP WHOOP!!! [pumps fist repeatedly] 

John: [glowers and crosses arms] I’ll wait. [pause] 

Jupiter: Oh, come on! You were going to introduce me the same way as everyone else? 

John: [pause and collects himself] You start off by doing an over-the-top introduction to say you don’t need an introduction?

Jupiter: [thinks] OH YEAH! I guess I did do that! 

John: You’re supposed to be the philosophical planet, right? 

Jupiter: [smiles] The rumors are true! 

John: Well, how about the philosophy of allowing the guy who writes the blog to introduce the guest? 

Jupiter: For the record, we’re more like FAMILY! I mean…this whole guest nonsense… 

John: Semantics! You’re just trying to justify overstepping your bounds, Jupiter. I’m not prepared to continue until I receive an apology. 

Jupiter: [contrite] I might have gotten a teensy bit carried away? 

John: Quite. 

Jupiter: FINE. [pause] I am very sorry, dear sir, and declare that I will… 

John: That’s more than enough, Jupiter. Thank you for that. I accept your apology. [picks up iPad] So why don’t you start by telling us about yourself? 

Jupiter: Dude, are you kidding? Everybody knows Jupiter! Why should I need to? I am the most well-liked astrological planet, to be sure, and enjoy a wonderful reputation. 

John: You do have a wonderful reputation for many people. But this interview is for people who might not know you very well, so I ask you kindly to indulge us. 

Jupiter: It’s not hard being so popular, I’ll give you that! When you’re the greater benefic and all. 

John: But let me correct your earlier statement: You are not the most-liked planet. 

Jupiter: Bullshit! No one is more enjoyed than I am. 

John: Honestly, I’d say Venus is. Do you want me to ask Mercury to poll a few people and provide some hard data. 

Jupiter: [hesitates] Well, I don’t think that’s strictly necessary, John. We all know the truth, right? 

John: It’s fascinating that you said that, Jupiter, because that’s exactly where I want to start. 

Jupiter: Oooooooooooooooooooooh! Getting serious right out of the gate? Do I get Mike Wallace, Leslie Stahl, Barbara Walters, or Howard Stern? 

John: Worse. You get me. 

Jupiter: Your reputation as a tough interviewer precedes you, John. At least that’s what I could get out of that planetary jock strap before he left on his retrograde vacation. Mostly what he kept repeating was about how you had all his favorite wing flavors, and I was confused but decided not to pursue that line of inquiry. But other than that he said, and I quote, “That dude fucking rocked my world, man!”

Sunday, July 11, 2021

Beginner Astrology Starting August 1 at Sticks & Stones



The time has come,’ the walrus said, ‘to talk of many things: Of shoes, and ships – and sealing wax – and cabbages and kings.’ – Lewis Carroll

After long last, good people, and your many requests, Beginner Astrology is going live!

It’s been many years since I’ve offered an in-person class on astrology, much less a series. But finally, everything came together!

I’m teaching beginner astrology in person at Sticks & Stones in Fairfax, VA, on Sunday afternoons from 4:30-6:30pm. “What is Astrology, Part 1” will happen on Sunday, August 1, with other classes following approximately every two weeks. Each class is $40 and there are no pre-requisites.

I’ll list the schedule below; you’ll only see the first nine classes on the schedule at the moment, but of course, others will follow. My general plan is to offer basic classes on each planet, sign, and house eventually. As the name implies, the class is for those new to astrology, but all are welcome!

To register, please contact Sticks & Stones via phone at 703-342-2343, or email them at sticksandstonescircle@gmail.com.

I look forward to seeing many of you for what will be an excellent introduction to the study of astrology!

Sunday, August 1—What is Astrology, Part 1

Sunday, August 15—What is Astrology, Part 2

Sunday, September 19—The Astrological Sun, Part 1

Sunday, October 3—The Astrological Sun, Part 2

Sunday, October 17—The Astrological Moon, Part 1

Sunday, November 7—The Astrological Moon, Part 2

Sunday, November 21—Mercury and Retrogrades, Part 1

Sunday, December 5—Mercury and Retrogrades, Part 2

Sunday, January 2, 2021—Venus, Planet of Love and Money, Part 1