Holiday Greetings from Jupiter!

Greetings everyone! I hope you are feeling expansive these days. Considering the amount of food many of you consumed in the past week I’d say you probably are. That’s OK! You only live once and no one’s really going to notice you moving back down a notch on that belt. 

This is a HUGE shout out to my Archers! Time to get out there and show everyone how to have a good time. Seriously people...you’ve gotta loosen up, because life is really too short. 

So you’ve probably noticed there’s been a lot of sexual stuff in the news lately. I moved into Scorpio a few weeks ago and I just can’t seem to get enough sex these days. I mean holy shit...I don’t know how you Scorpio sun, moon, or rising sign people can be like this all the time. And now that I’ve arrived, it’s sex everyplace you look. I’ll be in Scorpio for about a year, so hope you get used to it. This shit is not going away.

By the way, I’m also the planet of publishing, so expect lots of sex books this year too. Woo hoo! Time to get our freak on!

Now of course there’s more to being in Scorpio than sex...not much, I’ll admit, but a little more. Scorpio is a very deep sign so expect lots of potential for spiritual and intuitive development. I’m the spiritual planet of this motley crew, although Neptune does some of that shit, the crazy drunk bastard, but a lot of that stuff falls to me. Is your spiritual path serving you? This would be an excellent time to ask yourself that question. 

If your desire for spiritual or personal development leads you toward tarot or astrology, I certainly hope you’ll consider asking John for a hand. He’s always looking to help people out, and no matter what Saturn says about him I think he’s amazing. You know there’s someone in your life that needs a tarot reading or a chart, and this would be a great time to hit him up. No, he didn’t ask me to say that, but unlike some astrological planets, I’m always trying to help the man out, you know? He may work like Saturn, but he parties like me!

Thanks for hanging out with me, people. Remember to thank an Archer today! They’re usually willing to say the shit that no one else will, and for that, they’re amazing. But they have feelings, too, so I suggest you watch what you say or they will fill you with arrows. If you happen to be dealing with a Sag sun person and a Scorpio moon or rising, consider those arrows coated with venom and extra sharp. You have been warned.  

So remember...”too much” is a relative term!

Expansively,

Jupiter, the anti-Saturn