Saturday, October 24, 2015

Mercury's Initial Report on SOTA 2015

Moon: Go right in, Mercury. The Sun's waiting for you.

Mercury: Thank you, lady. I'd like you to join us for this meeting, if that's OK with the boss. 

Moon: How very thoughtful of you, Mercury! I'll ask him.

Mercury: Of course, Lady...and I know that he's going to tell you everything anyway so why should we make him repeat himself?

Sun: [from the office] Mercury, are you coming in here or not? I've been waiting for this report...

Moon: [gets up from her desk] Give me a moment, Mercury, please. [enters the Sun's office].

Sun: Come on in, Merc.

Mercury: [enters and sits down] Thank you, sir. 

Sun: Good suggestion on asking Lady Moon to be present. She's typing up the report anyway so it makes perfect sense for her to be here. 

Mercury: Glad you agree, sir. [pause] Where should I begin?

Sun: I don't have time for a full "brain dump", Mercury, so start with the most important things, please. 

Mercury: Yes, sir. [pulls out tablet and starts swiping] Here we are. Lots of excellent stuff being discussed. One facet of this conference in particular is how even handed they are about Saturn. There are always a few groans from the audience when he comes up, but the presenters have done a great job giving the positive side of him. He'll be really pleased to hear pleased as he can be. 

Sun: Really? That's outstanding news. Lady, please make sure that Saturn hears that ASAP.

Moon: Yes, sir. I'm on it. 

Mercury: All of us were in conversations about transits that may be positive for love and relationships. Again, the presenter was excellent and very even-handed. 

Moon: Did they mention transits to my nodes? [looks at the sun] Oh, sorry, sir. 

Sun: Go ahead, Lady. Please. 

Moon: Thank you, sir. Anything on transits to my nodes and love, Mercury?

Mercury: Yes, ma'am. Actually there was some stuff on it. I think humans are disappointed that those nodal transits aren't longer because some of them are pretty damn good.

Moon: [Beams] Indeed! 

Sun: What's on the agenda for today?

Mercury: Again, a great schedule chock full of facts. "Astrology and Grief" was this morning, and then this afternoon there's a presentation on declinations over a lifetime. 

Sun: Super important, that last one, and it gets kind of complex, but that's good. If people are going to study us they need to take it seriously. 

Mercury: And they are, sir. Astrology conversations are going on constantly this weekend, before, during and after classes, at receptions and in bars. It's all astrology all the time for this group.

Sun: Excellent. At the next meeting you'll present your findings, right?

Mercury: An abbreviated version, yes, sir. 

Sun: I expect your report by Monday COB, and it will be the framework for any observations that the other planets might have had. We'll send it by email but you know as well as I do that Neptune doesn't read his email half the time. 

Mercury: I had heard that, sir, but I had no evidence to back that up. 

Sun: You can trust me on this one, Merc. [chuckles] I think we're done, Merc, except for one last thing...

Mercury: Sir?

Sun: Our favorite blogger presented this morning. How did he do?

Mercury: I didn't really look into that, was on tarot so I wasn't sure if you'd be interested in it...

Sun: But you must have heard something!

Mercury: Initial reports seem to indicate that he did well, and while I know his presentation skills are solid, I don't have much to back that up.

Sun: Well, John's solar return is tomorrow, so I'm especially keeping an eye on him. [turns to Lady Moon]. Please leave out my interest in John's presentation when you compile the report, Lady, if you would be so kind. Some planets are a little testy these days. 

Moon: These centuries, you mean, sir? Like planets that begin with "S" and end with "aturn"?

Sun: Lady! [sighs] Mercury, you are forbidden from broadcasting that. The last thing I want is the greater malefic with something to hold over me. 

Mercury: I'll do my best, sir. 

Sun: Do better than your best, Mercury. I expect your report in two days. 

Mercury: Yes, sir. I'm off. [runs out of the room]

Moon: Sorry. Sometimes my emotions get the better of me, boss. 

Sun: Luna, please don't say anything like that in front of the chatterbox of the astrological planets ever again. Him or Uranus, actually.

Moon: Yes, sir. [low voice] He's still a prick. [leaves the office]

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